You Called?
by fireflyjunction
Summary: Angst and fluff and sheer insanity! A drunk dancing Persian and ballet corps calamity. Christine and Meg and her mother too, the Fop, his brother and the rest of the crew. Erik and his modern pal Mandy, who always cheers up that masked eyecandy!
1. Getting Rid Of The RiffRaff

_Author's Note: First posted story! (Not first written, but it just demanded to be posted **first**, pushy little bugger!) Made a few minor changes since I was updating anyway. _

_Disclaimer: I own Mandy and Tom! I do not own Erik, Christine, Nadir, Meg, Madam Giry, The Lion King or anything else really, but I do have hope that one day that will change._

"Oh, come _on_, Mandy! You're not going to sit up here all night and type your stupid little stories! It's Friday night, we're supposed to be going out remember?" my annoyingly whinny would-be boyfriend complained. Tom really wasn't such a bad guy; trouble was he wasn't such a great guy as I was learning during our pre-dating trial period. He was just your average college jock with an inflated self-image to maintain, which translates into not being seen at the local bar on a Friday night equals failure, especially if he dared to show up sans girl.

"Yeah, I remember. Just let me type this last bit on…" I was stunned into silence as the screen before me went completely black. Turning I found a grinning Tom holding onto the power cord of my now disconnected, faithful old clunk of a computer.

"You did _not_ just unplug my computer."

"You bet I did, can we go now?" His smile widened as he walked over to my side. "You should put on your black top though, you look great in that."

"I have just spent three hours in front of this screen, trying to finish my masterpiece, which you have just consigned to oblivion, and you think that I am going to change my clothes and go with you to a bar?"

"Yeah." Apparently I must have been giving him an angry look or something because he began to get defensive on me. "Hey don't get mad at me, I've been waiting half an hour for you to finish. And besides," he began to smirk again. "If you didn't save it its your own fault not mine."

"Its _my_ fault that you unplugged my computer!" I realized I was beginning to get a little hysterical and tried to keep calm. Yeah right, not happening anytime soon. "Its _my_ fault you showed up an hour early, and couldn't let me use _my_ time to finish…"

"_Your_ time?" he yelled in astonishment. You know, I think he was getting a little bit upset by my blatant refusal to take responsibility for the sudden loss of my work. Go figure. "This relationship is supposed to be about _us_. You spend more of _our_ time typing up your childish fantasies about a dumb fictional character than you do with me!"

"Erik is NOT a fictional character!" Yep, it was a screaming match now.

"Oh sure he isn't! He's a real person isn't he! Sure he's real and he's only been dead for a century!" Now shouting like a lunatic, Tom was towering over me as I sat in my dinky desk chair. "You love that dead guy more than me, don't you! That ugly, dead freak!"

"ERIK!" I screamed, putting my entire soprano voice behind it. What can I say? I couldn't take anymore. Tom stepped back, looking confused and, I happily noted, somewhat deafened.

"_You called?"_ I smiled as I turned to look across the room where the dark shadow of the character in question had appeared.

"You bet I did," I muttered, casting a death glare at Tom, who was trying to look unfazed by the sudden appearance of this specter in my room. "Well, I don't think you two have met. Erik, this is Tom. Tom, meet Erik." I got up from my chair, my legs screaming at me as the circulation returned, and trying to hide my limp, hobbled over to stand by Erik.

"I am delighted to meet you monsieur" Erik casually greeted, watching as I continued to beam my glare of death at that miserable little weasel.

"Yeah, right back at ya 'Erik'." That little creep was smirking again! "That's a nice costume you've got there. Did you rent it or did you have your mommy make it for you?"

I was all set to break into some really foul language right about then, not to mention pounding his fanny into the dirt, but Erik, being the great guy he is, cut me off.

"_A lady never swears, my dear,"_ he whispered to me before addressing that thing over there. "My choice of attire for the evening is of no importance at the moment, but if you would like to discuss fashionable clothing at a later time I'm sure I could give you much advice on the subject, as it is quite apparent that you lack even a passing knowledge of the basics of coordinating apparel_."_

Wow. Can I get a whoop whoop! Go Erik! Mentally I was doing my dorky little happy dance as I watched Tom slowly process what had just been said and come to the conclusion that he had just been insulted. It took a while.

"We'll have to do that sometime" he glowered. "Till then, you mind telling who you are and what you're doing here, weirdo?"

What kind of a comeback was that? Ok I know I shouldn't encourage him, but he better learn to do better than that and fast cause Erik is a professional at this game.

" I am Erik, as has already been established."

"Yeah and I'm Santa Clause!" I had considered dating the guy with that brain? I plead temporary insanity. Or it could have been something I ate.

"Well you certainly seem to have the mental capacity for the job. I don't doubt that the job of manual labor and eating cookies is well within your limited abilities."

Score! Happy dance in overtime now! Tom was really getting mad and he made a poor attempt to return my glare but switched it to Erik as he continued speaking.

"As for your other question, I am here because Mandy called me to come. From her apparent attitude towards you, I would hazard a guess that she has found your repugnant company tiresome, and wishes you to leave. I can only hope the request is permanent."

"I'm not going anywhere!"

"Really? I think you'll find you're sadly mistaken. However, you likely no longer mourn your numerous errors in judgment after having endured so many."

"Just get lost Tom," I called out from behind Erik, who was steadily stalking his way over to Tom. "Go find somebody else who can make enough _us_ time for _you_!"

"You just be quiet! I'll deal with you later!" Erik was now looming right in front of him. "First I'm going get some things straight with your little Phantom here."

"He's _not_ mine, darn it!" Agony! Bad enough you have to type disclaimers in every single chapter in every single story, but to have to deny him in front of other people is unbearable torture!

Erik was smirking now. "And she is not yours, so you would do well in avoiding giving orders to her." He leaned forward to whisper conspiratorially. " I find most women have an intense dislike of being told what to do. Of course, since none of them has ever before show any interest in you, much less in obeying you, I would not expect you to know that."

For a moment, apparently all Tom could do was adjust the color of his face to a nice sunburnt shade of red. Once that moment passed however, it was obvious that he had also fried his brain as he attempted to swing a punch at Erik.

"Come now, monsieur," Erik taunted, dodging the punch easily. "Surely such a fine specimen of ineptitude could put up a better display that that."

"I'm gonna display your blood you freak and then show your face to the floor!" he cried, lunging for Erik.

"Well, in that case" Erik laughed as he tripped his oncoming opponent. "I believe proper introductions are in order. If you would be so kind?" Tom hit the floor; face first, with a satisfyingly resounding thud. Erik continued to softly chuckle as he watched Tom pick himself up off the floor. His nose was bleeding and his face was all scrunched up as he tried not to cry.

"Go home Tom," I said softly as I walked over to him. "I want you to go and not come back."

"Okay," he whimpered, and bravely marched past Erik and down the stairs. Faintly I heard the door close and his car start, then drive away. Erik sighed and turned to go, when I lost it. Again.

"What is it?" he asked incredulously as I broke down into tears. "You can't be sad about losing that boy!" I could only shake my head 'no' as I continued to sob, sliding down the wall into a broken heap.

"What then?" he asked gently, kneeling down beside me.

"Its all gone!" I wailed, blubbering like a baby.

"What is?"

"My work!" I sobbed, impulsively reaching out and grabbing him, seeking comfort in his hug. Well, okay so I was squeezing him to near death, I was upset!

"Oh…" he managed to gasp out as I held him in my chokehold. "It'll be fine, you can just retype it."

"It was my masterpiece! And now it's gone forever!" I had by now soaked his shirt and desperately needed a handkerchief, but settled for sniffling, as I didn't want to let go.

"I have faith in you."

It was a Lion King Moment, no doubt about it. The heavens opened, the light shined down upon us, animals everywhere gazed in awe and suddenly I knew I could do it! I could replace what had been stolen! I could conquer dastardly foes! I could triumph over evil! The fate of the world rested in my hands and I alone would prevail!

"Really?" I sniffled. He just grinned at me and nodded. Relinquishing my captive, he helped me rise and leading me over to my desk, I plopped into my chair as he gallantly swooped down and plugged in my computer. The little light blink furiously for a moment before the normal login screen appeared.

"There, all set to go. Just have patience and it will soon be good as new, if not better than before." He stood again and adjusted his cloak, as I logged in. "Well my dear, it has been fun but I really must go. The show's due to begin soon and I promised Christine I'd be there. Besides, I have to go save my seat before the fop beats me to it. What's wrong now?" he asked noticing my own scrunched up face as I started to cry again.

"You're going to leave me all alone?"

"Yes," he said very patiently as if I were a three year old. "I'm going to watch Christine and you're going to type your tour de force, which I'm sure will be wonderful, and you won't even miss me."

"Yes, I will," I pouted defiantly. When giving someone a guilt trip, lay it on thick, that's my motto. "I be sitting here all by myself, in my lonely old apartment, while you go and have lots of fun without me." Crossing my arms across my chest, I thrust my bottom lip out for all it was worth, and tried unsuccessfully to pop a tear.

He sighed dramatically, fuming no doubt, before he suddenly grinned. "I'll send Nadir round to keep you company while you work."

"Alright, I guess…" I was thrilled but simply lowered my head and sighed despondently. Erik fidgeted a little and I could tell he was feeling guilty. Just a little more and he would crumble.

"Maybe after the performance I could bring Christine over for a while…"

"That would be kind of nice… I haven't seen her in a while." I smiled a thin smile at him and he brightened visibly. Ah-HA! He was going down now! Victory was mine!

"I'll bring Meg and Madam Giry, too! We'll make a regular party of it to celebrate your breakup! Err…to celebrate…" realizing what he had just said, he fumbled, trying ever so hard to be polite.

"The end of the school week?" I helpfully supplied.

"Yes, that's it! No more classes for you till Monday!"

"Great! I've got chips and stuff and we can play games, and watch movies and…!" I stopped babbling as Erik swiveled my chair around to face the screen.

"Right, now you start typing. Daroga will be here soon and then we'll have a big party that will be lots of fun. Okay?"

"You got it buster!" I laughed and began the monumental task of retyping my magnum opus, waving goodbye to Erik as he turned to go.

"Oh, and Mandy?" he paused before the large mirror.

"Yeah?" I muttered, not even pausing from my typing.

"Do NOT invite the fop!"

_Read on and then review!_


	2. Getting Ready To Party!

_Author's Note: Sorry about the delay, I was forced against my will to spend some quality time with the real world. Now that I've served my time I'm free again! A big thank you to all my reviewers! I tried to email most of you but some of you guys don't post email addresses so sorry about that! Anyway you're all at the party, just like I promised! _

_Disclaimer: I own Mandy, (Yippy!) and Tom (silence). I do not own any of the Phantom characters or any of the people at the party. It is a cruel world but somebody's got to say it._

No sooner had Erik stepped through the mirror than I hit the save button and ran to the kitchen, rummaging through the pantry and making a mental list of party foods I had on hand. I was almost to the bottom shelf when there was a knock on the door.

"Who is it?" I called out wondering if Tom had decided to make another appearance this evening.

"It is I," the voice behind the door announced. Now I know of only two people in the world who would ever answer using that grammatically correct but unbelievably cheesy greeting, and my English teacher doesn't know where I live. Well I hope not anyway.

"Come on in Nadir!" I shouted and continued to dig through the shelves.

"Good evening, Mandy. I just wanted to say I'm deeply sorry for your loss and that I am honored to be here for you in your time of despair." He gravely announced as he joined me in the kitchen.

"Hold on, what? What happened? Who's dead? It isn't Erik, is it?" My heart slammed to a halt, my lungs refused to cooperate and, jumping up, I banged my head on the shelf in my moment of panic. Of the three, would you believe my stupid head hurt the worst? Erik could be dead and I was going to start crying over an owwie?

"To the best of my knowledge, Erik is fine. I was referring to the untimely demise of your work, of which I have been informed was of great importance to you."

"Oh, okay. Wooh, you had me really worried there for a minute." I had to take a deep breath before I passed out. "You sounded like an obituary." My brain was clearly suffering from lack of oxygen but that's never stopped me before so I continued on. "Anyway no worries about the masterpiece, my computer may be older than dirt but my software's pretty good. Autosave resurrected most of it, so it should be finished in no time. Right now I have a party to plan! "

He gave me the strangest look. "Erik was extremely concerned about your mental state due to the combined effects of the loss your work and Tom, and now you're saying that really nothing was lost?"

"Hey! My mental state is my concern! Besides, its not like I knew that it would do that! I'm as surprised as you are!" I protested, putting on my best 'wounded innocence' face while rubbing my sore head.

"I somehow doubt that and even if it were true, why didn't you inform him of this before he departed?" Rats! A perfectly good effort wasted. Maybe I can use it on Erik later though…

"Well, he was going to go off and just leave me here! How not fair is that! He could have at least offered to take me with him! Even if the fop takes _his_ seat, he has the whole box to choose from! Not to mention the rest of the entire theater!" I replied switching to my pouting pose. Mentally I proudly noted that it has just as successful on Nadir as it had been on Erik.

"I guess you're right…" Yep, works every time!

"Besides," I giggled having won round one. "Doing things _my_ way is much more fun! We're going to have a party!"

"I think you are almost an unscrupulous as he is! You should be ashamed of yourself for using him merely to get what you want." Mental images of my Mom wagging her finger at me popped into my head and I tried not to laugh in his face.

"Compared to the things I could do, getting him to come to a party isn't really using him and besides it only works if he falls for it. I'm thinking the theme should be Mexican fiesta. Any thoughts?" I asked, quickly switching topics on him.

"What?"

"You know, that isn't exactly the best answer for the question."

"Your party is going to have a theme?"

"Are you kidding? All good parties have themes! Where have you been Nadir?" he regarded me with yet another odd look."Okay bad question. Moving right along…"

"Exactly how big of a party is this going to be?"

"I'm just inviting a few friends of mine…" Though I really have no idea who they are…

"Favor me with your definition of 'a few'," he commanded sternly.

"Well...I'm not exactly sure about that yet…around ten or twenty, maybe…"

"Ten or twenty!" he gasped. "Does Erik know of this?"

"Not yet!" I giggled again, handing him brightly colored balls of crepe paper. "Go tape this all over the place. It's going to look great!"

"Well, who are these 'friends' anyway?" he asked a moment later, having finally figured out how to use the tape dispenser.

"Just some people I met on the internet…" I avoided his eye and instead watched as the streamers unrolled their way across the floor.

"What! Mandy you know Erik doesn't like strange people! What am I saying, Erik doesn't like people at all!" the poor guy looked ready to have a heart attack.

"But these aren't… well okay they _are_ strange people, but they're not just any people, they're phans!" I cheerily informed him, trying to prevent his clearly imminent collapse.

"Not phans! They'll try to make you share the secret, Mandy! You must not tell them!" So I'm thinking that may not have been the best thing to say to him. Wracking my brain I found the answer. Logic, whenever a situation is becoming critical, stay calm and use logic! (Babysitter's guide to emergencies. Then call 911.)

"Why not? They have the same right to call upon you guys as I do." My obnoxious mind played out the phone call. Me: _Hello 911? I have a non-fictional Persian from the late nineteenth century lying on my living room floor…I think he's dead but he won't let go of the tape dispenser…_

"Mandy, I think its wonderful they care about us and I know how happy that makes you, but Erik is going through a stressful time right now, what with this whole Christine business, and the last thing he needs is a hoard of adoring phans yelling for him every minute! Please promise me that you won't tell!" he cried falling to his knees.

"You're a major downer you know that? Alright I promise." Always honor a dying man's last wish.

The second he glanced up at me I knew I'd been had. Perfectly composed and grinning like a maniac, he stood and collected the fallen streamers and proceeded to finish taping them to the ceiling. I stood there glaring at him, wishing all manner of evil upon him, till I came up with a better idea.

"Okay, well here's the list." I sweetly informed him, handing him the sheet of paper.

"The list…?"

"Yeah, I promised not to tell them, I didn't say they weren't coming to the party." He frowned at me but I continued on. Revenge would come later. "Now you go get them all and bring them back with you. They don't know you're coming to get them but they'll be happy to see you anyway!"

"And why must I go get them?" He may have won round two and he was trying for three as well, but I wasn't about to get caught again.

"These people don't even live in the same state as me Nadir! How else are they going to get here?"

"They're your friends, why don't you go get them?" Bait that hook all you want buddy, this fish isn't biting.

"I have to get everything ready for the party and be here when everybody else shows up. Look, just go get them." Magically sensing I wasn't playing his game he grabbed the paper and stormed towards the door.

"Oh and Nadir?" I called as he opened the door. "Bring them through the mirror when you get back. They'll all like that and the last thing I need is for my landlady to catch a glimpse of you and a hoard of party-ready phans on my doorstep!"

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"Okay everybody! Glad you could make it! Thanks again for coming! Before we get started, I do have a few rules you all have to follow." A collective groan went up from the assembled crowd.

"Yeah I know, but they're not really so bad. Rule one: Due to a promise I made to a very annoying person who shall not be named," I'm sure nobody noticed me scowling at Nadir, who was standing in the back… "I cannot reveal at this time how I am able to contact Erik and company so don't bother asking. Any attempt to torture it out of me and I'll sic the Persian on you. Contrary to popular opinion, this would not be a good thing.

Rule two: Erik needs personal space and you will not mob him the second he shows up! Or any second after that! He isn't yet aware that you're all going to be here so umm.. you're going to have to hide in my room till he shows up. Rule three: Don't touch _anything_ in my room. Failure to comply with these instructions will result in a slow and painful death. I am not kidding. Okay other than that, have fun at the party everybody!"

The group glanced around rather nervously before Nadir herded them off to the bedroom. Just in time too for no sooner had the door shut that Meg and her mother appeared through the mirror. Not that Meg or Madam Giry would care about a mob of Phantom lovers, but there's no way Meg would be able to keep the secret for more than three seconds once Christine showed up with Erik.

"Hi Mandy! Thank you for inviting us to the party! This is going to be such fun!" Meg announced, bouncing around like a deflating balloon. I remain convinced that there is some cosmic force that calls to excessively chirpy girls to become ballerinas. Why can't just one of them be a Goth or something?

"Uhh, hi Meg, Madam Giry." True to form, the older lady looked like she was ready to smack anybody who _dared_ to dance less than their best at the party.

"_Good evening_," she answered. Wait, who invited Dracula? Too creepy. " I have brought some sweets for your party."

"Oh, great! Thanks a lot, just go put them over there on the table while I finish these decorations." Miss Happiness of the year didn't follow her but instead incessantly tugged at my shirt. "Yes, Meg?"

"I just wanted to tell you, I told Jammes about your party and she told Annette and she told…" Seeing that this could take a while I helped her to the end.

"So the entire theater knows I'm having a party _and_…"

"Well, not the entire theater…" shifting her feet she looked ready to start her tirade all over again.

"Come on spit it out."

"Well, I invited all the ballerinas, and Sorelli invited Philippe and he's bringing…" Instantly my mind pictured the only fate in the world worse than death…

"NOT THE FOP!" Silence.

"Good heavens no!" she giggled nervously. "Who would bring their little brother to a party? He's bringing…" She stopped again and I seriously considered throttling her when I noticed the reason for her silence. Erik was leading Christine through the mirror.

"Hi Erik! Hi Christine!" I cried, hugging them and sneakily maneuvering them away from the mirror. Now I just need to figure out how to block the escape route…

"ERIK!" The doors to my bedroom burst open and a human tidal wave crashed out, a seemingly endless mass of crazed worshipers, arms outstretched to touch their idol. Like a startled merekat, Erik's head shot up and he made a mad dash to the mirror…

"CHRISTINE!"

…only to be brought up short as another wave spilled out of the mirror, this time a swarm of insanely perky ballerinas intent on hugging their bestest-best diva friend. With nowhere to run and sure to be crushed between the demented forces, I did the only thing I could to save him.

"Where in the world have you been hiding…" I began the silly little song, my strong voice drowning out the chaos. The phans, recognizing the song and being compelled to sing along, stopped inches away from poor Erik and joined me in the song as the ballerinas, thinking we were playing hide and seek, abandoned their attempt to hug Christine and ran for cover. We could have easily sung through the entire score but eventually we had to stop because no one wanted to sing Raoul's part.

"You ought to be ashamed of yourselves!" Nadir cried into the silence as he picked himself up off the floor. "Trampling your elders and then nearly breaking one of the rules! I have never seen such an unruly…"

"Nadir, its _my_ house. I get to discipline them." Bestowing upon the group my 'evil genius grin' I continued. "Breaking the rules calls for death, but since you only _almost_ broke the rules, I'll settle for sending you home by midnight!" Keeping an eye on Erik, to be sure he wasn't about to try to sneak out again, I let them whine and beg away.

"As for you ladies, I am appalled!" Madam Giry scolded the gaggle of ballerinas collected under the table, waiting to be found. "You must learn how to make a proper entrance immediately! Now back to the theater with you, we will work till you get it right!" Resisting the urge to applaud, I watched as she escorted the chastised girls through the mirror, and then resumed my conversation with the assembled phans.

"Now that everybody is clamed down a bit, I like you all to meet Erik, Christine and Meg. You've already met the Daroga." Most ignored the two ladies and the fuming Persian, preferring to gaze at the rather stunned dark angel standing in my living room.

"Now I want us all to be good friends though it seems a few of you apparently know each other already. Some better than others." At my pointed look, Erik took to examining the ceiling for spider webs as Christine, catching on to the innuendo, alternated glaring at him and some of the blushing girls. This was going to a _lot _of fun!

"Alright everybody, lets get this party started!

_**AN:** For anyone wondering what has happened to Tom, I am pleased to announce that he has joined Raoul Lover's Anonymous. The four existing members are thrilled and have unanimously voted him member of the year! Go Tom!_

_Anyway, next chapter WILL be the party, and you're all going to be there! Some other characters might just wander in and some may even be kicked out! Who knows what might happen!_

_P.S. Don't forget to review!_


	3. The Party!

_**Author's Note:** Hello again everybody! Just for you I have obediently followed my muse (stop laughing Erik!) and am pleased to present to you this next installment of insanity! You have _no_ idea how hard this chapter has been to write! It just fought me every step of the way but I promised everybody the party. Speaking of the party, everybody who reviews is there, so if you haven't reviewed yet just look at what you're missing! Even though I love all of my reviewers, I won't be mentioning any names because it would drag the story down to be saying so-and-so was over by so-and-so doing this and that all the time, so just imagine you're there and have a good time! _

_**Disclaimer: **Is there is anyone who knows when the copyright on Erik and company expires so when that day comes I can stop typing this sickening admission of the fact that I do not own any of said copyrighted characters? By the way, Mandy is still mine!_

"Mandy, may I have a word with you in private?" Erik whispered to me as I dashed into the kitchen to grab my brownies out of the oven.

"Sure thing, what's up?" I replied all innocence and smiles as he followed me in and closed the door in the faces of some o the phans who were following him around as if in a daze. Stifling a smirk, I removed the brownies from the oven and attempted to hack them apart with my dinky plastic knife. It was an unspoken house rule that sharp objects were not allowed when Erik was around, lest he be tempted, but you had to draw the line somewhere and if he couldn't be trusted with plastic knives, the world was doomed anyway.

"Did you invite all these people?" he asked, leaning against the counter, clearly struggling to stay calm.

"Nope!" I cheerfully replied. "You invited the book characters with the exception of the ballerinas. At least I hope you didn't invite the ballerinas. Anyway, I know _I _didn't invite the ballerinas but other than them, yep I invited them."

"_Why?_ How could you do this to me?" he ranted as his control slipped away. "I trusted you and this is how you repay me!"

"Tell me how you really feel Erik, just let it all out," I soothed, quickly stashing the knife in a drawer. Hey, I'm not about to get myself blamed for the fate of the world! Walking over to him I touched his arm and tried to appear sympathetic and understanding. "Think of it as therapy…"

He gave me his little half-amused smile and was about to reply but just then a timid knock on the door interrupted our session and Christine's pretty little voice called out through the door. "Mandy, Sorelli's here with Philippe. Do you want them to…"

Her voice was lost as Erik suddenly panicked and grabbed me by the shoulders shouting, "Tell me you didn't invite the Fop! You promised you wouldn't invite the Fop!" His eyes looked ready to pop out of his head, poor guy.

"I promise I didn't invite the Fop."

"Raoul!" Christine happily exclaimed through the door.

"I promise I didn't invite the Fop," I repeated. Erik groaned and sank to the floor. Sliding down to sit beside him, I tried to think of some way to cheer him up.

"Oh, I haven't told you yet! My masterpiece wasn't destroyed, isn't that great!" Erik mumbled something that sounded suspiciously like "whoopee" but I ignored his sarcasm and blabbed on. "Lets see what else…Oh! Nadir helped me with the decorations and stuff. He's really very talented, you should go see it."

"I'm not going back out there." He muttered, sounding halfway depressed and halfway like a pouting kid. He's just so cute! " Not if _he's_ there."

"Now Erik, you have to go and look at them or you'll hurt his feelings. You know how sensitive Nadir is about stuff like that." Receiving only a snort in reply, I frowned at him. "Besides, Raouly-boy won't be staying because he wasn't invited and nobody crashes _my_ party." Standing up I held out a hand for him but he just looked at me. "Come on Erik, everybody wants to see you."

"Uhn't uh."

"Fine. _You_ can kick him out, okay? Just get up off the floor and come out to the party for a while. It'll be fun, you'll see." Scowling up at me he continued to sit on the floor so I gave it to him, the ultimate threat, the worst possible torture I could think of. "If you don't come out right now, I'm going to tell all those people out there to get in here and make you come out using whatever means necessary."

"Fine!" he snapped, ignoring my hand as he pushed himself up off the floor. No sooner had he risen though than he burst into tears. "She doesn't love me! She'll never love me…!" His shoulders drooped and his head hung limply down, instantly reminding me of dear old melancholy Eeyore. How can you stay mad at somebody like that?

"Awe, come on Erik, just give it a chance. Besides, it's hard to fall in love with somebody who isn't even in the same room."

"I guess so…" he sniffled pathetically, trying to stop the tears.

"Oh, come here…" rolling my eyes I gave him a big hug and felt him gingerly hug back. "Now, don't you feel better?" I asked, smiling as I pulled way. He smiled back shyly and nodded. "Good. Now wipe off those tears and lets go have some fun." Collecting my plate of brownies we headed out the door together.

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"Ah, Sorelli, and Philippe! How wonderful you could come!" I greeted the two late arrivals pointedly ignoring the Viscomte who was sitting on the sofa next to Christine not two feet from me as I set down the plate, which was instantly attacked by the apparently brownie-loving phans. I was pleased to note that they obediently followed the rules and didn't swarm over Erik as he walked over to stand beside Christine who smiled up at him, though every last one of them tracked him with their gaze, like a pack of wolves awaiting any sing of weakness to strike.

"Meg dear, could I have a word with you?" I asked over the blaring music, my fake smile hiding my true desire of smacking the chatterbox whose big mouth had been the cause of poor Erik's distress. "So nobody brings their little brother with them to a party huh?" I asked as soon as we were where no one could hear.

"The Comte didn't bring him, he brought the green bean casserole! The Viscomte just showed up!" she gaily chirped, making even her denial sound like a pompom cheer. Ugh! Death to excessive happiness!

"Well he's going to leave right now!"

"Who's leaving?" Nadir asked as he limped up behind us startling Meg, who jumped up looking ready to run screaming and telling tales of her near-death brush with the Opera Ghost. Giving her one of his odd looks he slowly backed away a step.

"Oh sorry, Daroga. I was just informing Meg here that his royal foppiness was about to immediately vacate the premises."

"What?" he asked though I couldn't tell if he was confused more by the terminology or the idea itself. I debated messing with his head some more, just for the fun of it, but decided my anti-fop campaign was more important, and that my revenge could wait a bit.

"Raoul is leaving now."

"He is?"

"He is." Glancing around him, I glared at a girl who was gazing adoringly up at a highly uncomfortable Philippe. The fact she was gazing wasn't so bad but the fact that she was petting his shoe as she kneeled at his feet was clearly not winning him any points with the fuming Sorelli. Taking the hint she scooted away but she clearly longed to take the shoe with her.

"Is he aware of this?"

"I was just about to inform him but since you were so kind as to volunteer to tell him, I'll just let you handle it." Pretending to brush him off with that I made it two steps before he spun me back around. Looking at his shocked face I couldn't help laughing. "Okay, clam down, I was just kidding. Of course I'm going to kick him out, why should I let you have all the fun? Hey Raoul?" I called as I waltzed back over to where he sat.

"Hi Mandy! This is a great party!" he announced, doing a very good impression of a bobble head. His little flock of fans tried unsuccessfully to imitate him without getting nauseous.

"Thanks, I'm glad you like it, but its time for you to go now."

" Why?" he asked looking up at me like a forlorn puppy with big tears welling up in his eyes. "Is it because you don't like me?"

_Yes!_ my mind shouted. "Of course I like you Raoul," _I like you fatally sick, I like you mortally wounded, drowned at sea…_ "But it's just that you weren't invited because I know how nervous you get around new people."

"I do?" the mental midget actually sat there and pondered this even as I collected his coat and things for him to go.

"Yes, you do and I would hate for you to have a panic attack or anything and have to call an ambulance and then be forced to try and convince them to actually help you…" I told him as he obediently rose and put on his coat. Christine followed as I escorted him to the mirror, chatting all the way. "Anyway I'm glad you had a good time while you were here. Maybe we can get together again sometime when there are less witnesses around."

"Yes, that would be splendid! Goodbye Mandy," he said as he reached out to hug and probably kiss me. The guy's a total kiss-aholoic. Jumping back about a yard I managed to politely nod goodbye as he turned to Christine. "Goodbye Little Lotte," he said before giving her a sickeningly slobbery kiss.

"Goodbye Raoul," she whispered as he marched out the mirror, then quickly grabbed a tissue to wipe the slime off her face with a look of disgust. Quickly returning to the sofa, she contentedly sat down beside the now happy Erik, who slyly gave me a thumbs-up. Surveying the partying crowd who were dancing or lounging around chatting with each other and the cast, I easily spotted my prey.

"Okay! One problem solved, now its time for revenge!"

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"See I told you it was good, have some more." I laughed, filling Nadir's cup to the brim yet again. Two down and who knows how many more to go, the Persian was defiantly getting wobbly but he would be completely smashed before the night was over if he kept up drinking at this rate. Although that wasn't my intention, he probably did deserve a nice hangover in the morning. He laughed and said something in Persian. "What?" I asked over the music, as we were standing next to one of the speakers.

"Pretty good, aren't you going to have some?"

"Maybe later, but don't stop on my account, you're here to enjoy yourself." I couldn't help giggling as he downed the entire glass and began to move to the music. While we had started out with some of the more upbeat classical music to placate Erik, but eventually somebody had put in more modern stuff that was better suited to a party. I watched as he began to really get into the music and advanced from a head bob to full body movement. Wriggling his way to the space being used as a dance floor, he instantly cleared the area as the phans all stopped to watch him go. Really it was just too bizarre, watching as he did "his thing", which apparently was a three stooges version of break dancing with a good helping of the Macarena thrown in. In any event, there was a whole lot of hip and arm movement and not a lot of talent.

"What is he doing?" Erik whispered in my ear as he watched his old friend try to spin on the floor.

"I have no idea but as long as he doesn't want to sing karaoke I'm okay with it." I replied as Nadir gave up on spinning and resumed his crazy epileptic dance. "Look at him! He's made of Jell-O, nobody moves like that!"

Erik chuckled softly and went to collect his friend before he disgraced himself any further, but Nadir, seeing Erik's intent to remove him from the dance floor, quickly avoided his grasp and climbed onto the table among the assorted party food goodies.

"Hey get off the table! That's unsanitary!" I shouted as he nimbly avoided stepping directly into anything, though his pant leg did get drenched in Philippe's green bean casserole. Instead of listening to me, he happily turned to face his laughing audience, and commenced to disco his heart out.

"Staying alive, staying alive!" he shouted along with the Bee Gees, doing old John Travolta proud. The mosh-pit that had assembled around the table was cheering like mad. "Ha, ha, ha ha! Staying allllliiiiiiiiiiivvvvveeeee!"

By this time, Erik was nearly in tears as he laughed at Nadir's antics. "What did you do to him!" he managed to gasp out between laughs.

"Me! Why do you think I had anything to do with it?" I laughed back as the song ended and Nadir began to lead the group in his dreadfully exuberant version of the YMCA all the while shouting out the words along with the song.

"This has you written all over it, don't deny it!" he shouted back over Nadir's atrocious singing, panting as he happily flung his arms around with the others. Too soon the song came to a close, to much applause, and the still giggling Erik gracefully climbed up on the table to bring the drunken Daroga down. "Come now Nadir, that's enough for this evening…"

But Nadir was not about to stop. He continued dancing as Erik pursued him

across the table, and then as a slow song started began to seductively swing his hips around, much to the delight of the ladies present. Several whistles and catcalls greeted his sexy swaying, as he began slowly unbuttoning his shirt.

"Come on Erik!" I taunted. " Show him how it's done!" Erik whirled about furiously, his face bright red but the some phans were already chanting his name, daring him to dance like Nadir, and the others quickly joined in. He clearly would have stormed off the table had he not glanced over to see a giddy Christine chanting his name with the rest of them. "Erik! Erik! Erik!"

With a dramatic sigh, he resigned himself to his fate and quickly catching the rhythm, started swaying along with Nadir and slowly slid off his cloak. Purposely tossing it to me, as if he quite correctly feared the phans would tear it to shreds, he glided his hands up and down his torso, occasionally undoing one of the buttons on his coat, drawing out the dance. At this point, screams of approval blasted the air and every woman in the room was desperately whishing he'd tear the damn thing off, but also wishing for this to last forever. Eventually the coat and vest also came off, revealing his glowing white shirt, and he continued to take his time with the buttons as he rotated his hips to the beat. Ever so slowly the shirt was finally opened and slid down to his elbows, revealing his muscular chest.

It was at this perfect moment two horrific things occurred simultaneously, the seductive music shifted into the duck song and Daroga threw up all over the table. Disappointed and grossed out beyond belief, a collective groan of frustration was heard, as the mood was undeniably broken. Thankfully, someone quickly shut the evil song off. With a look of pure relief Erik quickly refastened his shirt and grabbed for his vest and coat, as Nadir continued to spew his cookies.

"I do believe," he muttered to Christine as he collected his cloak from me. "That it is time to go my dear."

"Yes, you're right," she wistfully replied as she gazed up at him, to the increased frustration of the female phans.

"Hey wait!" I cried to his retreating from. "Daroga's too drunk to get himself home, much less any of these people!" His only response was to raise his eyebrow. "Look I'd take them myself, but it wouldn't be safe. What if they tried to gang up on me and make me tell the secret…?" He considered this for a moment before nodding with yet another sigh of defeat.

"Okay everybody," I announced over the sounds of Nadir gagging, "Erik's taking you home now. I want to thank you all for coming, and I hope you had a good time." Several snickers were heard while Erik blushed. "Anyway, I'll see you later and I just want to remind you that Erik is quite prepared to kill anybody who touches him. Goodnight and pleasant dreams!" With many cries of "goodbye!" and "so long!" the group cheerfully departed leaving only Meg, Sorelli, Philippe, Nadir, who had finally stopped puking, and Christine.

Turning to the remaining few guests, I continued my farewells. "Sorelli, thanks for coming and you too Philippe! That was a great casserole! I'll wash the dish out tonight and get it back to you tomorrow." They both nodded happily before departing through the mirror.

"Meg, would you be so kind as to escort the Daroga here home. He's not quite up to traveling alone. I send you with a plastic sack just in case." Running to the kitchen, I grabbed the sack and quickly ushered the green-looking man and endlessly perky girl out.

"Wow," I sighed dropping to the sofa beside Christine. "That was some party!"

"Yeah," she giggled. "It was the best party I've ever been to!"

"Just don't let me do it again for a long time okay? I don't think I could handle it without a _lot_ of sugar!" We laughed together and then settled into a comfortable silence, waiting for Erik's return.

"Mandy?" she asked after a while.

"Yeah?" I yawned.

"Do you like Erik?" she timidly asked.

"Of course I like Erik! He's the best!"

"No, I mean, do you _really_ like Erik?"

"Yes I _really_ like Erik. What are you getting at here?"

She sighed in frustration. "Do you love him?"

"Absolutely."

"Oh…"

"Is that it? Oh?" I questioned, turning to face her.

"Well it's just that… I mean…"

"Look, I love him now and I'll love him forever. That really doesn't mean diddley cause he's totally crazy about you and thinks of me as plain crazy. No biggie, I can handle that. Whether or not you break his heart is your affair, but if you don't learn to talk in complete sentences I cannot be held accountable for my actions."

Realizing I wasn't really going to smack her, she grinned at me and then stuck her tongue out, so I stuck mine out at her. This continued for a while until we were both laughing hysterically. That was how Erik found us.

"Come Christine," he said, an amused smile upon his face as he watched us madly giggling. "It is really very late."

"Yeah, see you later Christine!" I said as I hugged her goodbye.

"Come and see us soon!" She panted, hugging me back, her face still bright red.

"You got it!" I laughed, as we pulled apart. "And don't think you're getting away without a hug!" I teased Erik, as he stepped forward to say goodbye.

Smiling back, he hugged me tightly, my head dizzy with happiness. Two hugs at one party! "Goodbye," he whispered stepping back. Silently I waved goodbye as they disappeared through the mirror. With a quick glance around to double check everybody had indeed gone home, I flipped off the lights and crashed into bed.

_**AN: **It's finally done! The party is over! Happy dance, happy dance! Do you see how long this chapter is! Not to worry, I'm not going to let this end yet! I've got way too many fantastic ideas for this story to just let it die off now! So ta for now!_

_Please Review!_

_PS – Philippe says he's willing to share his green bean casserole recipe if anybody wants it! _

_**Disclaimer**: I didn't want to spoil the surprise at the beginning but I also don't own Eeyore, the three stooges, the Macarena, Jell-o, the Bee Gees, their song 'Staying Alive', John Travolta or the Village People's 'YMCA'. I accept this and have moved on with my life._


	4. Saturday Night Madness!

_**Author's Notes: **Wheeeee! This is so much more fun! You really don't know how much I struggled with the party, but now its over! Happy dance, happy dance! Sorry about the delay, my Internet connection was down for a long time. Bless all my wonderful reviewers (you know who you are) who keep me going. Well, that and my evil muse (yes you Erik!) who pesters me anytime, anywhere. _

_**Disclaimer:** I don't own anything in this story except Mandy and Marcel. Though Marcel is up for grabs, since Tom wasn't exactly inspiring mass adoration, I feel the newbie may wander off by his lonesome too._

Having slept the morning away, I spent most of Saturday afternoon cleaning up from the previous night's party. Two huge trash bags stuffed to the brim, and three hours of vacuuming later the place looked as good as usual. Plopping into the comfy sofa with a big bowl of Mac and Cheese, I settled down to watch some movies and relax.

It was halfway through the final battle for Middle Earth, when it happened. The noisy wheeze of the furnace suddenly stopped and a chill insinuated itself throughout the apartment. Naturally, I did the only reasonable thing one could do. Several tissues later, as the end credits rolled by, I stopped sniffling just long enough to pick up the phone and call The Landlady.

"I _know_ the furnace is out! Nearly every tenet in the building called me to complain half an hour ago!" she ranted. "Look, the repair guy says he'll be here in the morning, till then, just tough it out!"

_Wow_, I thought as she slammed the phone down. Sounds like somebody needs an attitude adjustment! I thought about calling for Erik to help straighten her out, but realized I really didn't want to go looking for anew apartment just yet so I let it slide, just this once.

Deciding that sitting up and watching another movie while uncontrollably shivering didn't sound like a lot of fun, I spread every blanket I owned onto my bed and settled in. Instantly warmed and smashed by the massive pile, I sleepily concluded hibernation really wasn't that bad, before slipping into dreams.

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Thump!

The sound echoed in the small room. Like a turtle emerging form its shell, I cautiously stuck my head out from my snuggly covers. Blearily opening my eyes, I squinted at the angry red numbers on my clock. You've got to be kidding, only ten thirty pm? I listened as yet another thump resounded from the living room. Grabbing my trusty aluminum baseball bat from under the bed, I bravely marched into the hallway, prepared to give any robbers some trouble.

Thump, crash!

Hey, nobody breaks my stuff! Quietly sneaking to the doorway, I raised the bat high, and seeing a tallish man in dark clothing attempting to walk around my coffee table in the dark, prepared to strike. Just one step closer…just a little more…three…two…

Instead of stepping around the table, the man crashed into it yet again and instantly began cursing in a foreign language. "Nadir?" I asked incredulously, recognizing his angry voice and some of the Persian's naughty words.

"Mandy!" he replied, clearly relieved to no longer be alone in the dark where unseen obstacles lurked. "Good Lord, its cold!"

"Yeah, the furnace broke down. What are you doing here?"

"Erik brought me. He just showed up and without a by-your-leave dragged me off…" I watched as he headed towards the direction of my voice, straight towards the sofa.

"Nadir! Look out!" I tried to warn, even as he crashed face first into the pile of pillows on the thick cushions. Trying to hide my giggles, I listened to yet another tirade of insults and swears angrily muttered in his normally elegant language. Turning to the wall, I flipped on the switch and illuminated things for the clumsy Daroga.

"Bless you o merciful one! Blast you and Erik for your accursed night vision!" grinning at his quickly shifting opinion of me, I tossed the bat back into my room. He fumed about for a bit; glaring at both the coffee table and the sofa, before flopping down into the armchair with a sad sigh. Walking over, I curled up on the sofa across from him.

"It is as I feared," he mournfully muttered, gazing towards the floor. "He tried to tell they were they same, but I knew he was lying. Again." Looking down at his socks, I saw that his words were true; Nadir wore one blue sock and one black sock.

"Hey, don't worry. It happens to the best of us." He snorted at this, but I glared at him good-naturedly and he smiled a bit. "So why are you here?" I asked again.

"I told you. Erik came for me and dragged me here. All he said was that I was to make sure that you promised not to get mad at him and that he would be here as soon as you made that promise."

"No way! If he's done something that deserves getting mad at, then to heck with any promises, I'll be mad!" Who am I kidding, I'm getting mad at the _thought_ of promising not to get mad! "Besides, I thought he didn't believe in promises or something like that. Knowing him it was probably an insult of some kind."

"Well it was, but I think he trusts your promises more than any other's." he paused for a moment and sighed. Suspecting something else was up, I was about to ask him but he continued on before I had the chance. "Secondly I have a sneaking suspicion I won't be allowed to leave till you've promised, so why don't we speed things up a bit and instead of you yelling for an hour and then promising, just promise now."

"Fine! ERIK," I shouted yet again. "I promise not to get mad for whatever you've done so you better get in here right now!"

"There's no reason to shout my dear, I was quite close by." He whispered into my ear, leaning down on the sofa behind me.

"What did you do this time?" I accused, tilting my head up to look him in the eyes, though upside down. There was something strange about them, I vaguely noted, before he stepped back.

"Well that's hardly the welcome I expected." He dryly replied. I noticed he was carrying over his shoulder what appeared to be a rather large burlap sap with a good sized something inside.

"Well, I'm pretty sure there's a reason for it. What on earth are you carrying?" I asked as he set the bundle down. I swear I heard the thing moan. He naturally ignored my questioning and proceeded to sit down next to me on the sofa.

"Hello Nadir," he greeted the frowning man sitting across form him. "Good to see you again so soon. I daresay you really ought to be more careful and look where you're going old fellow." He snickered at the other man's growing impatience.

"Are you going to tell us or not, Erik?" I asked before Nadir started losing his temper again.

"I heard there was going to be some sort of film festival on television tonight," he smoothly evaded. "Do you know what they're showing?"

"Yeah, it's a bunch of Vincent Price horror films. The Fly, The House of Wax, some stuff by Poe, I think…" I trailed off as he began to grin rather devilishly. A creepy Erik is not a comforting sight.

"Ah, yes The Raven is a classic, I must say…" he muttered quietly before suddenly shouting, "No, not the Raven! Red Death! Red Death!" he clasped his hands together and grinned gleefully.

"Erik?" I whispered, fighting off the shudders. He sat silently for a moment, and I was seriously considering asking Nadir to switch seats with me when he began talking again as though nothing out of the ordinary had happened.

"Frightfully cold weather we're having isn't it?"

"The furnace is broken Erik," Nadir calmly replied. "Now are you going to tell us what is going on?"

"First things first, Daroga," he announced as he jumped up from the sofa and held a hand out to me to help me rise. "We cannot have a calm and civil discussion if we cannot hear over the chattering of our teeth. Clearly I must fix the furnace."

"Do you know how to fix furnaces Erik?" I asked as he helped me up. "I mean, have you ever fixed one before?"

"No."

"Oh, okay." Slipping on some shoes I suddenly felt a strange tingly sensation on the back of my neck but thinking it to be caused by the cold, ignored it. We turned to head towards the door when Erik suddenly snarled and spun about, expertly throwing the Punjab lasso around the throat of…

"Philippe!" I exclaimed, shocked. Erik quickly freed the Comte, and pointedly stepped away. "What are you doing here?" My god, how many times am I going to have to say that tonight to men who randomly show up in my living room! And will anyone ever answer me?

"I uhh, I was umm…" suffering the aftereffects of the shock he had just received, he was having some trouble getting started. Well he's not getting any sympathy from me, who do these people think they are anyway, marching into my apartment whenever they feel like it! "Oh, yes! Mandy have _you _seen Raoul?"

"Not since last night," I replied, trying to ignore Erik's snickering. "Did you lose him?"

"Well I heard there was some odd happenings or some-such at the opera house and his name was mentioned. I haven't seen him so I naturally became concerned for the public's safety and have set out to find him. I'm very sorry to disrupt you, I had no idea you had company."

"Not a problem. Well, normally I'd help you track him, but I've got to keep an eye on Erik while he fixes the furnace," Erik scowled at me but I just grinned back at him. "Anyway, I wish you luck on your quest and I'll give a shout if I see him."

"Thank you Mandy, goodnight. Goodnight gentlemen." And with that he dashed off through the mirror.

"So what's going on at the opera house, Erik?" I asked trying to keep the irritation out of my voice. He sensed it anyway and only smiled mischievously back at me.

"First the furnace, then explanations," he grinned even wider as I got even madder. "Remember your promise my dear," he taunted as he led the way out of the apartment and down the stairs towards the basement.

"Yeah well, remember the Alamo you obnoxious toad," I muttered, as Nadir and I followed him down the stairs. The sound of his evil laughter echoing up the stairwell the only sign he heard me.

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"Are you sure about this Erik?" I asked for the hundredth time since we had journeyed into the dimly lit basement where the dead furnace stood. So what if it had only been five minutes?

"Yes," he sighed before returning to the task of smacking every exposed surface of the thing with the wrench he had found nearby. Suddenly a horrific shriek from the top of the stairs momentarily stunned us all.

"What do you think you're doing!" The Landlady screeched. Carlotta sure had nothing on her, I noted, shaking my head to end the ringing echoes.

"We are minding our own business, Madam, while I am attempting to repair the antiquated death trap that heats this building." Erik replied before I could open my mouth.

"Do you have any idea who I am?" came her indignant query.

"Not the slightest and the same answer applies to the question as to whether or not I care to find out." This time he didn't even bother to pause his hammering when answering her.

"I am the owner of this building I'll have you know!"

"Fine, now that I know that you are personally responsible for retaining this mechanical monstrosity you may consider your duty done and therefore depart." Seeing this conversation was inevitably going to end up with the police involved one way or another, I decided to jump in and take things over for a while before an ambulance arrived.

"Hey Mrs. McGreevy! It's just me and some friends of mine. Were tying to fix the furnace for you."

"Mandy? Is that you?"

"Yeah, and this is…Radu and that's Bob," I replied pointing at Nadir and Erik respectively. Nadir nodded politely but Erik just snorted derisively. "He's a bit obnoxious but he's good at fixing things."

"I don't care how good he is! If he breaks anything I'll…"

"Suddenly develop a brain capable of an extensive vocabulary?" Erik murmured.

"Look, if you don't get out of here right this minute…"

"Ah ha!" triumphantly Erik held up a tiny hose for all to see. Unfortunately, as dark as it was, the gesture proved to be rather pointless as neither Nadir nor Mrs. McGreevy could see anything. "The hoses are clogged with a bit of dirt. It's a quick fix for now, but you'll want to replace the filter to prevent any further obstructions." Shaking lose the clogged hose, Erik soon had the furnace up and running, filling the room with delicious warmth.

"Well don't expect any money for this, _Bob_." Mrs. McGreevy snapped before turning and marching back up the stairs.

"I charge nothing for the furnace but assuredly deserve some compensation for the mental and emotional suffering I have endured while in your unwanted company." Erik muttered as he replaced the wrench.

"Now Erik, play nice," I teased as Nadir and I followed him back up the stairs to my apartment.

"I assure you that my playtime manners are quite impeccable," he replied absently. Nadir and I shared an odd look at his weird behavior but continued on.

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"Wait a minute," I told the two men standing in the hallway behinds me as I unlocked the door and slowly opened it. "Did one of you leave the kitchen light on?"

"No," Nadir answered, somewhat irritated. "I couldn't find a light to turn on and Erik wasn't in the kitchen."

"Are you so sure?" Erik distractedly asked. "But don't worry Nadir, I'm sure you'll find a light someday who thinks you're good looking." Noticing Daroga and I giving him another odd look, he smiled pleasantly and held the door open for me to enter first. Wishing I had brought along my bat, I resigned myself to letting Erik take care of any bad guys who might be lurking about. They didn't know how lucky they were.

Walking around the corner the first thing I saw was the enormous bowl of buttery popcorn. The fluffy white kernels were still steaming as the golden butter dripped gently, covering them in yummy goodness. My mouth was watering in anticipation when my sudden craving was instantly killed upon seeing whose hand was in that same bowl.

"Raoul!" I was so distraught I nearly puked. Thankfully Erik was there to save me. Turning away from the awful sight, he led me to a chair as my knees went wobbly and sparkles appeared in my eyes. Nadir thoughtfully began fanning me with an old magazine.

"Oh, Mandy! Are you alright?" Instantly Erik's attention was gone as Christine bounded into the room carrying a bag of candy bars. I considered puking on his shoes out of jealously but decided I'd save that treat for Raoul if at all possible.

"Yeah I'll be fine," I muttered as she kneeled down beside me and began rubbing my hands comfortingly. "As long as you give me some chocolate anyway." She grinned up at me and handed me the whole bag.

"I'm very sorry Mandy," Raoul announced as he walked over, keeping his eye on Erik and his hand on a revolver at his hip. "I had no idea you were allergic to popcorn." Erik rolled his eyes, Nadir raised an eyebrow, Christine looked remorseful, and I waited for Raoul to step into firing range.

"Don't worry, I'm not." I sighed in frustration as he stopped about a foot too far away. Yet another evil plan foiled!

"You're not getting sick are you?" Christine worriedly asked, pressing her hand to my forehead. "If you're sick, you should go to bed and Erik," she seemed to start at the name and looked nervously up at him. "He will make you some medicine so you get better." She anxiously looked over to Raoul, who smiled at her, and smiled back. Nearly gagging at their lovey-dovey smiles, I made a mental note to learn the trick behind projectile vomiting.

"Look, I'm not sick," I said, trying not to get irritated as I pushed her hand off my head. "I'm fine okay. Don't worry about it." I stood up and began pacing the small room. "What are you doing… Arrgghh!" Refusing to ask the same question again I totally lost it and ran to my room, slamming the door shut. Flinging myself upon my bed I screamed insanely into my pillow. My god, these were the most annoying people in the world, I swear!

I hadn't been done screaming for two seconds when I felt the bed shift as someone sat down beside me. Knowing full well whom it was, I kept my face buried in the pillow.

"Mandy?" he quietly asked. I sighed as he gently stroked my hair.

"What?" I murmured, turning my head to look at him.

"_Are_ you aright?" he asked, honestly concerned.

"Just peachy." He smirked but kept stroking my hair.

"Then sit up. I want to talk to you."

"No."

"Come on, roll over." His tone was still light but I could tell he was serious. Too bad, so sad, cause I'm still mad!

"Make me!" His gentle smile instantly turned malicious. "Okay never mind," I quickly replied and jumped up.

"I wouldn't have hurt you," he sadly whispered, looking away.

"I know that! I thought you were going to tickle me or something." I told him, laying a hand on his shoulder. "I didn't mean to hurt your feelings." He smiled faintly in the dark before nodding.

"I seem destined to hear that a lot, though I'm sure you mean it." His sigh seemed to fill the room.

"Of course I mean it or I wouldn't have said it!" Much to my annoyance, he sighed again. "And stop it with the dramatic sighs, I feel like I'm at the ocean or something." I grinned as he chuckled lightly, a much better sound. "What did you want to talk about anyway?"

Yet, before he could answer there came a timid rapping at my bedroom door.

"Mandy?" Christine called anxiously. "There's a sack in the living room that is moaning."

"And wiggling…" shouted Raoul.

"And wiggling," She repeated. "The Persian tried to open it but the knots are too tight…"

"Be right there!" I shouted back. "Do you think they ate all the chocolate?" I muttered to Erik as I climbed off the bed and headed towards the door.

"No," Erik replied, as he pulled the bag out of a pocket in his cloak. "I brought it along in case this was an emergency."

"Good plan."

"I thought so." He smugly replied.

"Do they know you have it?" I asked, pausing at the door. He shook his head. "Then don't tell them!" Giggling merrily as he again stashed the chocolate within his pocket, I led the way back to the living room, where the mysterious wiggling bag awaited.

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"Oh Nadir, that's so gross!" I gagged, entering the living room. The Persian man was on his hands and knees apparently trying to gnaw through the ropes holding the bag shut. "Do you have any idea where that sack has been?"

"No," he replied, pausing from his chewing. "Though since it is Erik's I would expect it have been in the labyrinth…" he seemed to be processing what he had just said and noticing for the first time the odd taste.

"Exactly! And since Erik hasn't cleaned the labyrinth recently, if ever, I would strongly advise against putting things like that in your mouth. Unless you are practicing for Fear Factor or something."

"Really Daroga! Didn't you even think to use your knife?" Erik chided as he deftly undid the soggy ropes. Grimacing at his hands in disgust, he stalked past Christine and Raoul who were sitting together on the sofa, and went to the kitchen sink to wash them. Knowing he couldn't see me from the kitchen I tried peering into the dark hole.

"No peaking Mandy!" Erik shouted above the sounds of the water in the sink. Grrrr! How many evil plans will go wrong before I get one right?

Grinning mischievously, Erik marched back into the room, drying off his hands with the towel. As he passed by the sofa he gracefully tossed the wet heap into Raoul's face, but kept walking as though nothing had happened, despite the Viscomte's spluttering.

"Are you ready for your surprise, Mandy?" he asked as he bent down beside the bag.

"What! Its for me!" Instantly I perked up. Catching sight of Erik looking at Christine, I also looked over at her. Her face instantly changed into a generous smile but not before I saw the jealousy underneath it.

"Yes its for you," Erik continued, smugly grinning at Christine. "Close your eyes till I get it out of the sack." Immediately I clamped them shut while mentally doing a happy dance. _Erik brought me a present! Erik brought me a present! _

Yet even over the sound of the singsong in my head, I heard Christine and Nadir gasp. For some reason it didn't sound like a good thing. "Erik?" I asked, suddenly feeling very unsure of the situation.

"Open your eyes," Erik whispered softly.

I have no idea what I expected to be in that sack. One of his beautiful toys perhaps, maybe even a music box, but certainly not at all the thing that stood before me!

"His name is Marcel," Erik happily informed me, enjoying my stunned silence. "Don't you like him Mandy?"

"Ummm…" I stood looking at the young man who stood before me dressed almost exactly as Erik was though without the mask. He really was handsome with dark brown hair curling about his shoulders. His green eyes were blinking rapidly, as if trying to clear them, but the instant he saw Erik, they lit up noticeably.

"le Fantome!" Marcel shouted joyfully, rushing over to grab Erik. "Blah blah blah blahblah blah!" He cried, or at least that about as much as I understood.

"What did he say?" I asked in confusion. None of those words made even the slightest bit of sense.

"He's thrilled to meet Erik," Christine replied, just as shocked as I to see this strange man trying to hug a contented-looking Erik.

"Blah blah blah, blah blah blahblah blahblah blah!" the newcomer announced yet again. "Blah blah blah blahblah blah!"

"Now wait a minute! Why is this person here and what the hell is he saying!" I shouted at Erik, who looked at me in confusion.

"Now Mandy, you promised you wouldn't get mad," Erik reminded me. "Marcel is your new boyfriend."

"What? You brought me a boyfriend! Tied up in a sack!"

"Yes," Erik chirped happily.

"Well get back to that in minute. First, what did he just say?"

"He said Erik is the best ever and that he would die to make him happy," Nadir managed to choke out as he stared in horror at the man proudly standing beside Erik.

"How come you can understand him and I can't?" I was by now thoroughly confused and upset.

"I don't know, he's speaking French just like we are," Nadir replied.

"Well there you have it! I can't speak French!"

"Yes you can," Erik replied, looking at me like I had two heads. "You're speaking it right now."

"No I'm not!" I cried, beginning to get hysterical.

"Okay so you're not. What language are you speaking Mandy?" I could tell by his sympathetic tone he thought I was going over the deep end but I didn't care.

"English!" Erik snorted at this and I really wanted to throw something at him.

"If you are speaking English, then how can Nadir and Christine understand what you were saying?" he asked gently as he walked towards me, noticing my anger building. The French-speaking boy followed him over and tried to appear sympathetic as well.

"I can understand you too!" Raoul chimed in. "I didn't know I was bilingual!"

"If you're speaking French," I continued, ignoring Raoul. "How could I understand you? How could any of the people at the party or Mrs. McGreevy understand you?"

"I highly doubt that odious woman understands me, but I do take your point," he paused for a moment, considering. "Is it possible that the same enchantment that allows us to visit each other's worlds also allows us to understand each other's language?"

"Well it sure beats the fop's bilingual theory."

"Blah blahblah blah blah blahblah blah blah," the intruder announced, scowling at me.

"What did he say this time?" I sighed.

Erik whirled around to glare at him while Christine politely interpreted for me. "He says you should die for causing Erik distress."

"Tell him to choose his weapon!" I snapped back angrily. I turned to head back for my baseball bat muttering "Sorry Erik but I'm going to kill your present. I suggest flowers next time." Of course Erik stopped me before I made it two steps. He grabbed me and turned me back around in time to see Marcel fall to the floor crying.

"Blah blah blah blahblah blah le Fantome de l'Opera! Blah blah blah blah blahblah blah!" He cried, tears running down his face. Erik's face fell and I turned to Christine again.

"All his life he has adored the great Phantom of the Opera and wishes only to be worthy of his acceptance."

"Theater major with a minor in psychology," I muttered under my breath as Erik whispered something soothing to the boy, who grinned through his tears.

"Blah blah blahblah blah blah!" he cried, nearly ecstatic. Erik gasped and jerked back as though burned.

"Don't say it!" Erik shouted angrily, spinning around to face Christine. "Don't you dare repeat that!"

"What did he say?" I asked him. "Everybody else understood him, why can't I hear what he said?"

"Because I said so!"

"Oh, well in that case…" I muttered sarcastically. "Well _I _say somebody better tell me what he said!"

"What who said?" Raoul asked from the sofa, looking around confused. Once again I ignored him and turned around to face Nadir.

"Tell me what he said Daroga!"

He sat perfectly still for a moment, not looking at me but rather at the fuming phantom behind me. "I will not go against Erik's wishes." He muttered finally.

Releasing a great sigh of frustration I turned to my only hope, Christine. "What did he say that made Erik so upset Christine?" I asked softly.

"Don't say a word Christine! Not one word!" Erik hissed.

"Erik shut up! Tell me Christine, what doesn't he want me to hear?"

"He's embarrassed," she whispered so softly I could barely hear. Of course Erik heard her just fine.

"No Christine! You mustn't…"

"Yes you must," I interrupted him. "Tell me!"

"He wants to be…" She timidly began before Erik stalked over towards her, murder in his eyes. She stood as if frozen, shaking in her shoes as he neared her. Turning around I found myself inches from his chest.

"Erik back off!" He merely glared down at me. "What are you going to do, hit me? I'll hit you right back and I mean it too."

"As if you could hurt me," he sneered.

"Hey, the bigger they are, the harder they fall buddy," I sneered right back. In a whisper only he could hear, I added, "Besides, this really isn't helping your cause any."

He seemed to fall apart right in front of me. Staggering over to the empty chair, he collapsed with a tragic sob. He wasn't broken, I noted before turning back to Christine, just banged up a little.

"Tell me what he said Christine." I commanded.

"He wants to be…to be," her eyes were riveted to the destroyed figure behind me. "He wants to be a Sex God like Erik."

"What!" I asked shocked. "Are you serious?" For Erik's sake I tried not to giggle, though it was _really_ hard. She merely nodded sadly and returned her gaze to Erik.

"Well shame on you Phantom!" Raoul stood up and shouted accusingly. "This poor boy only wanted to be your friend and you refused him! Well if that how you're going to be, he's going to be _my_ special friend!"

"Raoul dear, you don't understand…" Christine began gently.

"Oh yes I do! He'll be my friend and we'll play games and do stuff together and have lots of fun!" He rushed over to the now-happy looking Marcel. "Won't we pal!" Marcel nodded vigorously.

"Oh shut up Raoul! I can't take it anymore!" I screeched at him. Suddenly I remembered a promise I made. "Philippe!" I shouted, deafening all non-musicians in the room. "Your brother is looking for you," I told Raoul as his hearing returned.

"Oh, okay…"

"Mandy! Did you find him!" Philippe cried as he dashed through the mirror. "Oh thank heavens!" he gasped as he saw Raoul. "Do you have any idea how long I have been looking for you! You're coming home with me right this instant!" With that he grabbed Raoul and started to physically haul him home when Marcel interrupted. I listened to yet another series of nonsense words but from Philippe's instant reply, found that I didn't need a translation.

"Look," Philippe answered angrily. "I don't care if you _are_ best buddies now, we're leaving and without you! Goodnight everyone!" Raoul pouted at his words and then, suddenly inspired, whispered in Marcel's ear when Philippe wasn't looking.

"Blah blah blah blahblah blah blah!" I really don't like this guy, I thought to myself as he blabbed on to Philippe.

"It is?" Philippe asked astonished.

"It is what?" I asked, debating whether or not I even cared.

"His favorite food is green bean casserole," Christine supplied.

"Well, in that case…"the Comte caved in. "I guess you can stay just one night…"

"Great! You three have fun! Bye now!" I smiled as I escorted them to the door. "See you later.."

"Wait!" Erik called softly, rising from his chair and walking towards Marcel. The boy looked at him with sadness and regret and a bit of fear, but Erik smiled gently and the boy halted.

"I didn't mean to be so unkind to you," Erik whispered. "But I love someone very special, and she doesn't see me as you do. I hope you understand." Marcel nodded and they shook hands before he turned to go with the others.

"That was very nice Erik," Christine murmured as she slowly but surely approached him. For a moment Erik looked at her with sadness and longing before turning away.

"Nadir, would you mind taking Miss Daae home?" he would not look at her but instead bent to collect his sack off the floor.

"Of course Erik. Goodbye Mandy," he called as he helped Christine with her shawl.

"Bye Nadir, Christine," I yelled back, standing and watching Erik neatly fold up the sack and put it in yet another pocket.

"Bye," she replied, glancing at me. Walking over to Erik she tenderly touched his back. "Goodbye Erik."

He did not turn or respond in any way. With a sigh, she returned to Nadir's side and he escorted her through the mirror.

"I should be going as well," he said after a long moment. "I need to work on my opera, I've been ignoring it for far to long."

"You're not going anywhere."

"Are you going to keep me here?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes."

"How?"

"By any means necessary, be they fair or foul." He grinned sideways at me before sitting in the chair once again.

"I guess I could stay for awhile."

"You're going to stay till I say you can leave."

"And when do think that will be?"

"As soon as I'm ready." I glared at him, knowing it was going to be quite a while indeed.

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_**A/N:** Okay I know its bad to end chapters without resolving everything but this was getting really long (mostly due to the free time I had while waiting for my internet to be running again). So next chapter you can expect a continuation of this scene as well as some surprises as always!_

_**Review Please! **_

_I save all your reviews and whenever I'm feeling down or anything I go read them to get happy again, so send me some new reviews to keep me happy!_


	5. A Little Chat!

_**Author's Note: **Hooray for everybody who reviewed! You're all the best and here are free cookies for all of you! Take as many as you want (but don't get sick) and if you review this chapter I'll make more! I'm hoping to average ten reviews a chapter so come on people, don't let me down!_

_**Disclaimer: **I own all non-book characters, enough said._

"Alright, I've got a whole list of things for you to explain so start talking."

"Where would you like for me to begin?" Erik still sat, perfectly calm, and with an amused smile on the visible half of his face.

"Well, let's start with the easy stuff and work our way up. Why didn't you say goodbye to Christine?"

"Hmm, I think we'll file that one away for a moment and move on to something simpler." He looked serious so I choose to believe him, but if he thinks I going to forget that one, he needs to get out more. Then again, maybe not.

"Fine. Why did she seem afraid of you earlier, when we first came in?" _Don't think about the popcorn. Don't think about the popcorn._

"That's really the same issue, so what's next?"

"Why didn't you want me to hear what Marcel said about you? Why did you have to tie him up in a sack? Why in the world did you even pick him!" Yeah, so what if I'm frustrated, you deal with these people for a while, and see how crazy you get!

"Not asking for much are we?" Erik taunted. "For the second question, after I took the liberty of giving him some sedatives, which made the journey much easier for everyone involved, I realized that I could hardly go gallivanting around with a comatose young man slung over my shoulder. So I simply placed him in the bag to maintain a normal appearance."

"You drugged him and then you kidnapped him!" Yeah, I'd guessed he had been, seeing as he was tied up in a sack, but suspecting Erik kidnapped somebody is totally different than _knowing_ he kidnapped somebody!

"You could put it like that, though I would certainly prefer less inflammatory terminology." Smug as ever, Erik simply watched as I paced the room.

"I'll bet you would. So why him? What made him so special?"

"Well this morning, while you were still sleeping, I came over to umm, to do some stuff on the Internet and I found a lovely email from him. At the time he seemed like a perfect match for you."

"Wait a minute! What exactly were you doing on the Internet Erik? You weren't sending threatening emails to fanfiction writers again were you?" A month ago I caught Erik trying to "convince" a fellow author to kill Raoul in any number of horrific ways or be killed in his place. Needless to say the ensuing argument was heard by most of the block and Erik didn't come back for a week.

"After the last fight we had about that, are you kidding! I'm insane not suicidal. No, now I go to the library to do that." He stretched his long legs out, nearly tripping me. "Do you really have to pace so? It's giving me a headache."

"So what _were_ you doing?" I asked as I dropped down to the sofa across from him.

"I signed you up on an internet dating service."

"You did WHAT!" Instantly I was back up on my feet. "How _dare_ you!"

"It said you'll find true love within a month. Isn't that wonderful?" he smiled up at me as I glared at him.

"It's about as wonderful as a root canal!" I screamed at him. "Are you sure about the whole "I'm not suicidal" thing? Cause I can't think of a better reason to kill you!"

"Look, clearly you failed to exhibit sound judgment and good taste when you picked Tom and though he hasn't been gone very long, I didn't want you to feel alone." His insane mood swings kicking in again; he switched from a tone of chastisement to one of begging for forgiveness. "Until I found Marcel, I thought this was the best way I could come up with somebody for you."

"Okay, okay. I'm sorry for shouting; I know you were trying to help. But you _will _unsubscribe me from that site _immediately_ and you will _never _do anything like that again, no matter how sweet a guy you are."

"Very well, if that is what you want." Though his feelings were hurt by my lack of appreciation for his thoughtfulness, the "sweet guy" part put a smug smirk on his face. I still wanted to pace about but plopped back onto the sofa just to keep him happy. Why do I do such stupid stuff for him?

"What did you write about me anyway?" I asked sullenly.

"I simply wrote that you were looking for your Mr. Right"

"Not good enough tell me _exactly_ what you wrote."

"I can't remember it _exactly_, but I believe it was something to the effect of 'engaging lady seeking charming gentleman willing to put up with verbal abuse and infuriatingly senseless logic."

"Yeah that ought to do it. No doubt I'll be swamped with offers," I retorted sarcastically.

"Well that is the general idea."

"Do you have any idea about some of the wackos that sign up for those things! Seriously Erik, this was one of the worst ideas you've ever had."

"Oh you needn't worry so much Mandy, this is a very… _selective_ website."

"What do you mean?" Suddenly suspicious I watched him closely through narrowed eyes. "It filters out the dangerous maniacs so you only meet the harmless ones?

"Hardly" he snorted in amusement. "It is a website for people like myself."

"Oh you mean for only _slightly_ dangerous lunatics who look good in dark clothing?" I interrupted.

"No. Lets just drop it and I'll see to it that your profile is deleted in the morning."

"Fine." We battled silently for a minute, till he glanced away. Letting it drop I resumed our earlier conversation. "So, back to the main topic. Next question, why were you acting so weird earlier?"

"To what are you referring?" he smoothly replied, looking genuinely confused.

"Well you don't usually shout "Red Death!" and randomly throw around bizarre comments. Plus, your eyes were funny looking."

"I'm afraid that was a side effect of the issue dealing with Christine. Are there any other questions you have before we go into that?"

"Umm…" why does it seem that there is something I'm forgetting? There was something he didn't answer… "Ah ha! You tried to skip over it but now I remember! Why didn't you want me to hear that Marcel thinks you're a Sex God?"

Erik groaned. "Do we really have to discuss this? It is embarrassing, that's all."

"I think there's more to it than that based on the way you were acting. Spill it buster!"

"Think about it Mandy! Christine is now terrified of me and other than Nadir, who would probably still be my friend even if I killed him, you're all I've got. Suddenly this crazy little Frenchman thinks I'm a Sex God! I didn't want you to get the wrong opinion of me so of course I didn't want you to know!"

"The wrong opinion of you? What does that mean?" he was bright red and still cross but I couldn't help but tease him a bit more. "Do you have some secret double life where you're a calendar boy? Oh I can see it now! You're Mr. December right! You're sitting on a Persian rug in front of this roaring fire with a glass of red wine…"

"Oh, grow up Mandy!" he shouted. By now he was a wonderful purple color and wouldn't look at me.

"And like any good sexy beast your shirt is hanging open and…"

"Please, I'm begging you to stop!" he leapt from his chair though he kept his head shamefully down.

"Fine, just admit that you are one hot phantom."

"Never!" his head jerked up and his eyes flashed like lightning.

"And you're wearing skin tight black leather pants…"

"Fine!" he snapped. Striking a dramatic pose he conceded, "I seem to be one hot phantom or a sex god or whatever and am incredibly desirable to women everywhere with the notable exception of the one I want. Are you happy now!" he crashed back to the chair in defeat.

"Pretty much, yeah." I grinned at him as I walked over to his chair and perched on its arm beside him. "You liked that, admit it."

Erik couldn't help but grin back. "You are a very strange girl."

"I know, but you put up with me anyway so you must be pretty strange too." We sat enjoying the friendly silence that followed our little tiff. I wished I didn't have to ruin it but I had to find out what was going on between him and Christine. "Erik, about Christine…"

He sobered instantly. "You have asked what happened at the opera house so I will tell you."

"Hey, you don't have to if you don't want to. I was just upset with all the secrecy stuff." Ha! Reverse psychology in action! Watch me go people!

"No, you deserve to know. Besides, if I don't tell you someone else will, and then you'll come after me."

"I'm not going to come after you, its not like you killed…" his expression of impending doom cut me off. "Oh, Erik you didn't!" Well, that sure put a kink in things.

"Yes I did, and for that I have lost nearly everything."

"Hey no matter what, you've still got me." I promised, trying to lighten the mood. I would have had better luck with a knock-knock joke.

"You say that now, but once you know then you'll change your mind." He muttered gloomily.

"Do you honestly believe that?" I asked totally shocked. He nodded gravely. "Fine, then you're not going to tell me."

"But you deserve to know!" he protested weakly.

"And you deserve a friend. I trust your opinion of me enough to know that if you seriously think that telling me this will be then end of our friendship, then I don't want you to tell me." He looked totally stunned. "I don't want you to destroy this relationship which I highly value simply because you feel compelled to inform me. Unless,"

"Unless?" he echoed softly.

"Unless you change your opinion of me enough to see that I really do care about you and really will stick by you forever, no matter what you do." Good lord I have to stop sounding like a hallmark card, or a sappy song heard while traveling in elevators.

For a moment he just stared at me incredulously. Then the tears came. Unending tears running down his cheeks as I reached out and hugged him. Holding me tightly, he brokenly told me of murdering Buquet, overhearing Christine and Raoul on the roof and the destruction of the chandelier. I sat quietly, almost too stunned to speak but knowing that he needed to tell me without any interruptions.

"And now she's gone! She'll never love me now!" he wailed as his tale drew to a close. "All I ever wanted was to be loved!" Part of me wanted to smack the moron and cover him in kisses, but thankfully the other side won out.

"Shhh Erik, everything will be okay. I promise."

"But will you keep your promises?" he sniffled.

"I promise I'll keep my promise." He snorted, slightly amused as I had intended. Leaning back I saw how exhausted he was. "Look, I don't want you to go back to your labyrinth alone tonight. Stay here with me."

"No, Mandy. That would be highly improper." He looked away, embarrassed again, but also desperate not to be alone again. "I would not tarnish your reputation."

"Oh shut up. Nobody cares if you crash on the sofa. And besides I said you couldn't leave till I said so, so you're staying."

"Really, I could not impose upon you." Seeing my glare he changed tactics. "Besides I did not bring my nightclothes." Instantly he sensed he'd erred. My insane grin must have made him slightly uncomfortable because he began fidgeting.

"Your point is?" Still grinning wickedly I let him sit and sweat for a minute before letting him off the hook. "No, don't worry about it, we'll just go and pick some things up for you to sleep in and to wear tomorrow."

"This isn't necessary, I will be fine by myself…"

"Erik, do not make me threaten you."

"Ready to go when you are my dear."

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"Hey Erik, this place looks different," I noted as we entered the house by the lake. The place was much cleaner than the last time I was here and far more romantic than I remembered.

"Your powers of observation are always so astounding. It is truly a wonder that Scotland Yard has not sent for you seeing as Inspector Holmes is away so often."

"Smart-aleck." I muttered as he went to his room to grab his stuff. "So when did you decide to become the official sponsor of the Paris Candle Company?" I shouted to him as I surveyed his extensive collection. There didn't seem to be two inches of free space in the whole house there were so many. I know that candles set a certain mood, but it's got to be hard to be passionate when you're trying to locate the nearest fire escape.

"I won't be much longer if those incompetent managers don't give me my salary soon."

"Yeah, it's got to be hard living on only twenty thousand francs a month. I can tell you're barely getting by." He snickered in amusement. " You ought to sue them or something."

"I think that after tonight's disaster they will be more than willing to comply with the small additions I made to their job descriptions." He shifted moods again, turning melancholy on me. "Though I suppose it doesn't matter anymore."

"Come on, its been a long day, you'll feel better in the morning." I coaxed him, taking his hand to lead him back towards the boat. "Don't make me break into a certain happy song from Annie that happens to drive you nuts."

"Anything but that!" he cried as he faked abject terror. "I'll do anything you want but don't sing that song!"

"Good. Now come on, lets get going. I'm tired."

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Returning from the labyrinth we stepped through the mirror into the now wonderfully warm room. The clock on the wall chimed three times as I hung our cloaks in the closet. The midnight blue cloak had been my first gift from Erik and I only ever wore it to when going through the labyrinth. Yes, I'm weird but not weird enough to wear it in broad daylight on a city street!

"It's very late, Mandy. You should have been in bed long ago."

"I was actually, but I had some unexpected company."

"Perhaps you will sleep undisturbed this time."

"Well I should hope so. There's blankets and stuff in that chest and you can hang your clothes in the closet over there." I said, directing him to my "office". No sooner was he gone than I began struggling to drag my ancient but sturdy bookshelf in front of the mirror. Erik wouldn't dare go out the front door as Nadir did and I didn't trust him not to sneak out during the night.

"What are you doing?" he asked as he emerged to the cacophonous screeching as I pushed it into place.

"Gee I don't know. Take a wild guess." Panting I rested leaning the side of the very heavy shelves that was now blocking his exit.

"You were suddenly overcome by an irrepressible urge to redecorate?"

"That's amazing! You could make quite a living doing that, just like those people on late night television! Just get a really phony accent and possibly a turban…"

"Goodnight Mandy."

"Well let's not be subtle or anything, goodnight Erik."

Grabbing a quick hug, I trudged of to my room to change into my pajamas. Just before I jumped into bed I decided to steal one last look to the sofa where Erik lay. Just to make sure he was all right…

"Hey!" I cried, seeing that he had somehow moved the bookshelf back to its original place without making a sound and now lay snuggled up in the covers on the sofa.

"Go back to bed Mandy," he chuckled. "And no more redecorating."

_**AN:** Aren't you all just so excited! Yet another chapter finished! Who knows what might happen next or where our bizarre duo might end up? (I do! I do!) _

_PS. The party chapter received the least amount of reviews of all my chapters, was there a reason for this? If so how can I avoid that problem in the future? Are there any requests for later chapters you'd like to put forth? Come on just review please!_


	6. Good Morning Mr December

_**Author's Note: **_

_My reviewers are the best, and don't I know it too!  
__I make them lots of cookies as thanks for their review!  
__And now the counter has reached up, past the big five o,  
__So please enjoy my unlimited dessert buffet before you go!_

_You guys are the best! I mean it! (Even if I can't write a good thank you poem to save my soul) Eat whatever you want; I'll make more if we run out! (Remember Internet calories don't count!) _

_Ah, I am so happy, my story is loved! Anyhow, there's a little bit of everything in this chapter so I hope everybody finds something they like. Sorry it's a bit shorted than normal but I just had to stop there, sorry._

_**Disclaimer: **Okay today is…hmm, would you believe how long I've been waiting and I still don't own these guys yet! Well, except for Mandy. How long is this going to take?_

Like a tiger stalking its prey, ever so slowly I crept closer to the target, silently closing in on my intended victim. Unsuspecting my evil intentions my quarry laid buried under the blankets, hiding from the morning sunlight that filtered through the window blinds. Closer and closer I crept, staying behind the sofa so he couldn't see my stealthy approach.

"Wake up!" I shouted, proudly having snuck up behind Erik without waking him.

"Is that how its done? I thought one was supposed to gently rouse the sleeper." I jumped at the sarcastic voice behind me.

"Erik!" I whirled around to see him causally lounging against the wall, half hidden in the shadows.

"The one and only." He grinned at my shock. Of course he was already up and dressed, looking spiffy as usual. "I was wondering when you would get up. I was going to fix you breakfast but there is absolutely nothing in this house to eat except something called Ramen noodles."

"Hey now, don't dis the Ramen, they're all us poor collage kids can afford!" Not to mention successfully cook… He didn't answer but gave me an odd look. I had that strange feeling you get when you've received one too many weird looks in a short time period. Its so great knowing that people have no idea what you might do next. It's even better when they start worrying about it!

"Never mind. So are you feeling better this morning?" I asked while still trying to cover my frustration at having my latest plan foiled. I _will_ get him one of these days!

"I am fine as always" he scoffed, raising his brow in his arrogant manner.

"You think sobbing on my shoulder for an hour is fine?" I glibbed back sarcastically. His smirking face, so temptingly easy to smack, now appeared bewildered and confused.

"I have absolutely no idea what you are referring to." I looked at him in shock. He really didn't seem to know what I was talking about. That or he's a far better actor than I ever thought.

"Okay, think back. Last night - weird little Frenchman, Christine acting strange, Mr. December… any of this ringing a bell?" He slowly shook his head back and forth a touch of fear creeping into his eyes. "How about the chandelier?"

"The chandelier!" he asked with audible relief. "Was that all?"

"Well not really, but do you remember it now?" I questioned gently, not wanting to remind him of the real reason for his sadness.

"No, but I think I know what happened." He sighed.

"Care to elaborate?"

"Not particularly." I glared at him and he shrugged good-naturedly. "But since I know that you will pester me to death if I don't tell you, I will graciously satisfy your curiosity. For now anyway," he muttered, his face going dark and his mind elsewhere.

"About the now part…" I not so subtly urged. He sighed again and grinned at my eagerness.

"Well my dear, it seems that if too many people are reading the exact same part of Leroux's story at the exact same time and they believe in us strongly enough, we tend to relive the experience." He looked at me expectantly and I had the nagging feeling he was making this up. "Well?"

"Well what? Are you waiting for me to clap my hands to prove I believe in Erik's story? You'll be there for a while." He glared at me angrily as I began tapping my foot impatiently.

"You dare imply that I am lying!"

"Did I imply that? Funny, I don't remember that part, but it sounds to me like you have a guilty conscience. I can't imagine why…" I gave him an unbelieving look. He quickly avoided my gaze but his anger remained.

"What difference would it make if I did? he growled. "If you're foolish enough to believe everything you're told, that's your problem. It's not my job to make everyone tell you the truth!"

"But it would be nice for _you_ to tell me the truth!" I growled right back, which wasn't exactly the best idea I've ever had.

"So you _are_ calling me a liar!" he shouted, advancing on me in his anger.

"Well fairs fair since you just called me a fool!" I angrily replied, unconsciously backing away from him. "If you're going to start calling people names, be ready for some payback!"

"Payback!" he snarled, his voice dropping eerily. "If it payback you so dearly desire, I think I can accommodate you, my dear."

"What the heck is that supposed to mean?" I retorted, struggling to keep the confident tone in my voice even as my insides trembled at this dark Erik who stood before me.

"Fear not, you'll learn soon enough," he grinned maliciously.

"Tell me!" I whispered, my command sounding far too much like begging. He just grinned at me.

"Mandy?" came a soft voice from behind me. "Is everything alright?"

I watched as Erik's eyes shot towards Christine's face. Instantly he dropped his threatening posture and masking his surprise, once more became the charming crazy man I knew.

"Yeah everything's fine," I told her without turning around, closely watching Erik. "Was there something you wanted?"

"Well, you'd said we're going shopping today and I just thought we could have lunch together too…"

"Sure," I said finally turning to look at her. She smiled at me uncertainly, aware that something was wrong but unsure what to do. "Lunch sounds fine. Would you care to join us Erik?" I asked without looking at him.

"Oh, please do!" Christine pleaded before he could refuse. "It will be marvelous! Just the three of us!"

"Very well, if you insist." He politely replied. She smiled gleefully and clasped her small hands together.

"Do you want to go out and eat or should I go bring something back?" I asked him; almost able to physically touch the tension in the room which Christine now seemed unaware of.

"I think it best for you to bring something here. We're not exactly going to blend in dressed in these clothes."

"Anything particular sound good to anybody?"

"Hmmm, those chips you had at the party were good, maybe some more of those?" Christine asked hopefully.

"I think there's some left in the cabinet but I've got to go the store to get some more. Maybe we could stop by after lunch when we go out."

"Okay!"

"So what do you want to eat besides chips?"

"I don't know," she answered, pouting her lips and wrinkling her forehead becomingly. I heard Erik deep inhalation of breath, though she missed it completely. "Do you have any suggestions Erik?"

"No, whatever Mandy brings will be fine." She nodded in agreement and I went to my room to grab my wallet and stuff. As I was coming back out, Erik met me in the hallway.

"Yes?"

"I wanted to apologize for my behavior earlier. I didn't mean to frighten or offend you," He whispered gravely, though his voice was nearly empty of emotion. I was about to make a scathing reply but looking up into his eyes, I could _see _the confused and desperate plea for forgiveness.

"Yes you did," I began, watching him stiffen in pain. "But because you're my friend I'll forgive you this time. But it better not happen again." I couldn't help but grin as I tried to remain strict with him. He sighed again. "What did I tell you before about all that sighing?" He grinned and shyly came forward to give me a hug.

"I'm glad you're my friend Mandy. I have a bad feeling for anyone who isn't." He chuckled softly in my hair.

"Yeah well remember that if you decide you really want your payback after all."

"I never said I didn't." I stiffened in his arms. He simply winked at me and let me go. "Get going, a hungry Christine isn't a pretty picture."

"Alright, alright! I'm going, grouch." I stuck my tongue out at him. "But after lunch we're going shopping."

"We?" He asked, arching his visible eyebrow.

"Oui," I replied, headed towards the door.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Having returned from Crazy Ed's Killer Cowburgers loaded with the store's famous slaughterhouse special combos I carefully maneuvered up the stairs trying not to drop anything, wishing Christine had come along to help carry stuff. The food may not sound too great, but even though Ed purposely picked the most horrid names for his burgers they were still the best around for miles. I decided I would let them eat their food without telling them what I had ordered, unless of course someone saw fit to become obnoxious again.

Finally reaching the door, I set some of the stuff down and unlocked the door and scooted it inside with my foot. Happy laughter escaped from the open door and I silently crept closer to see what was going on. Entering the empty living room, I set the stuff down on the coffee table and followed the sounds to the kitchen. Erik and Christine sat side-by-side, though not too close, perched on the barstools. He said something to her and she laughed again.

Watching them together I couldn't help but feel happy for my friends. They seemed so right together, not just cute like Raoul and Christine did. Erik was smiling freely, his tense posture gone, and he seemed to radiate a sense of peace I had rarely seen. Christine was beautiful as always but she seemed happier than usual also and dare I say somewhat more intelligent. I decided right then that I would do whatever it took to keep them both this happy.

"Mandy?" Erik asked, sensing me in the shadows. His grin didn't fade even as he deftly scooted away from Christine as though he were a schoolboy who had just been caught.

"Nope, guess again!" I joked, stepping into the room. "You guys want to eat in here or in the living room?"

"Why would we eat in the living room?" Christine asked innocently.

"Well I usually do so I can have the TV on." She looked at me confused again.

"Why do you watch the TV while you eat?"

"Lots of reasons. I like to watch the news and make fun of the dumber reporters, plus I don't have to hear myself chew. Besides," I added with a grin. "Its my apartment so I can eat wherever I want!" Yeah! Now how cool is that! "So where do you want to eat?"

"Lets eat in here so we can talk."

"At last, a decision is made," came Erik's voice behind us and we turned to see him with his arms loaded with the food I had brought up. We both giggled then moved to help take the stuff from his arms and set it on the table. Soon we we're all happily devouring burgers and chips.

"So what did you want to shop for Christine?" I asked the girl who was busily stuffing chips into her mouth.

"I'm not sure," she answered as soon as she had swallowed. "Something I can wear when I visit so I can go see stuff and not feel awkward." She paused to sip her drink then almost choked in her sudden excitement. "We should get Erik some clothes too so he can accompany us!"

"Hey now there's a thought," I agreed happily, even as Erik made a small choking sound. "Maybe we could even get him to wear some colors."

"Oh yes!" she cooed happily. "Raoul has a pink shirt he looks so adorable in, maybe we could find one that would fit Erik!"

"I think not," came the stern reply from the would-be pink shirted man. "The last thing I will ever be is adorable." I looked over to Christine and rolled my eyes and she giggled happily.

"Well its pretty much the only thing left to be after mastering just about everything else," I teased him as her giggles quieted. "Seriously why didn't you just pick one occupation and stick to that, you're making the rest of us look like slackers."

"I'm not wearing pink," came his pouting reply. "I notice you never wear it either."

"And I am so obviously fashion conscious!" I sarcastically joked. Christine started giggling again and I hoped she didn't choke. "Anyway I wanted to buy some black pants for school, my last pair have totally faded out. We'll get Christine a pair too. I usually go the grocery store today anyway, so we'll stop by there while we're out. Let me just get some comfy shoes on and we'll go."

Five minutes later we were headed down the road.

"Erik pick a station and keep it there." I snapped as he continued to endlessly turn the dial. Rap, Country, Rock and Roll, all went by in an incredibly irritating blur that was quickly giving me a headache.

"But I haven't found the station I like," he complained as the dial continued to spin under his fingers.

"Well, what are you looking for?" I asked through gritted teeth. The man looked at me astonished.

"Opera!"

"Erik they don't play opera on the radio stations around here." Stop changing channels, if you know what's good for you _stop_ changing channels…

"Yes they do, you just have to find the right station…" the dial continued its dance and I completely lost it.

"No they don't!" I screeched as I knocked his hand away and turned off the evil sound monster he had created. Clearly stunned, my anxious passengers said nothing about my outburst but Erik kept a watchful eye on me as we drove along. "Stop looking at me like that."

"How would you prefer I look at you?" he asked sarcastically.

"Not like that."

"Well that was conveniently vague." I turned to glare at him. "While you are driving I would prefer you didn't look at _me_. It is not a habit conducive to safely operating a motor vehicle."

"You are so going to pay for that." I muttered as I glared at the road. Christine sat in the back of the car, happily watching the world go by.

_**AN:** So what do you think? Erik's off for a day out with the girls! Are you ready for this? (Techno music starts up) No wait! He's going shopping for clothes, people! (I'm Too Sexy starts playing) That's more like it! You go Erik!_

_PS - While you are impatiently waiting for me to update, go read CloudXInXCrimson's The Tale of a Fateful Trip! It's great, I promise!_

_Obligatory yet still heartfelt plea for REVIEWS PLEASE!_


	7. A Grand Adventure

_**Author's Note:** Well apparently none of you live anywhere near me or you would have recognized Crazy Ed's. Yes Virginia, he really does sell Killer Cowbugers. (And they're the best you'll ever eat! Not that many people eat Killer Cowburgers but that's beside the point. Besides Erik ate one so all true phans should feel compelled to track down their own just so they can say they ate one also!) _

_**Disclaimer:** I do not own any of the POTO crew, John Wayne, Survivor, Picasso, Dante, EBay, Barney, Fabio, the headless horseman (or a Hawaiian shirt), but Mandy is all mine!_

"Alright everybody, we're here!" Hurrah, we finally made it! "Now we're only going to get some casual stuff for you to wear around here so no flipping out!" I commanded, looking directly at Erik, who shifted uncomfortably. "Come on, it won't be so bad! I could have taken you to the mall!" With that I jumped out of the car leaving them to follow. As if they could survive the mall, Erik couldn't even behave himself in the basement of my apartment building.

"What are we looking for Mandy?" Christine asked as we headed for the door.

"We'll get you both some jeans and a nice blouse for you." I grinned wickedly before continuing in a whisper. "And see if we can't find Erik something interesting to wear!"

"What was that?" The man doomed to wear an interesting article of clothing hissed from behind me.

"I was just saying you need a coat. You really stand out in a cloak, even if it does suit you marvelously, Mr. D." He glanced away as though embarrassed and I once again suspected he remembered more than he admitted to. Well, there's more than one way to catch a ghost…

Picking out a pair of black jeans for Christine and myself was easy so we quickly moved on to a blouse for her and a shirt for him. Wandering around in the ladies section with a very self-conscious Erik in tow, we finally narrowed the decision down to two blouses, a deep blue satin tee shirt and a vibrant green peasant top, but decided she would try them on after helping Erik to pick out a shirt as well. So our odd little trio meandered into the men's section.

"Now then Erik, name your three favorite colors." I said as I eyed the multitude of color-filled racks of shirts for sale.

"Black." Came his instantaneous reply.

"And?"

"Black."

"And your last choice?"

"Black."

"Fine, Christine we are looking for something in red, blue or green." Erik spluttered angrily but before he could say anything nasty I cut him off. "Or did you say yellow, purple and pink?" I grinned once again as his anger simmered just beneath the surface and watched as he bit his lip in an attempt to refrain from commenting. Just as Christine and I turned to start searching through the racks for a shirt, one of the shop girls wandered over.

"Hi, I'm Kristi. Is there anything I can help you with today?"

"Well my friends need some new clothes to help them fit in better," I explained as she looked at Christine's dress in confusion. "They're European."

"Ah!" She exclaimed knowingly then she glanced over at Erik, and glanced again. "What exactly are you looking for?" She asked as she gazed up at him.

"The tribal council has voted that Bob here needs to discover the joys of shades other than black, so something colorful would be good."

"Right! I know the perfect thing!" with that she rushed over to a rack towards the back and began rummaging through the hangers. "Here it is!" she cried as she rushed back with her find. As she held it up for us to see, everyone could hear Erik's pitiful whimper.

The Hawaiian shirt was riot of brilliant colors that swirled and blended together, almost sickening to look at. The vibrant hues glowed with an unnatural light like a creature that crawled out of the radiation from a nuclear blast.

"Umm, how about something a little bit toned down?" I asked as I squinted at the thing.

"Are you sure?" she asked as she lowered it and looked longingly at it. "This shirt is very popular!" She held it up again and I briefly considered buying it just to be able shed tears of joy as I destroyed it later. Shaking my head no as I fought my pyromaniac tendencies, she trudged back to it rack and sadly hung it back up.

Suddenly all the air in my lungs was violently forced out as Erik grabbed me in a death grip. "Thank you, thank you, thank you!" he desperately whimpered into my hair. I made some small choking noises and he released me quickly. Shaking my head to dispel my dizziness, I smiled in the general direction of his voice.

"How about this one?" Kristi asked, as she returned with another insanely bright shirt. It was apparently inspired by Picasso and the designer had simply intensified the colors to the point of potential retinal damage.

"No, I think we'll just browse a bit and see if we can't find something he'll like."

"Okay just let me know if you need anything," with a smile and a wave she wandered back off towards the front desk. Everyone sighed in relief as she left and I couldn't help but hum a few bars of the hallelujah chorus for which I received a pained smirk from Erik.

"Well then, now that we have survived whatever level of Hell Dante decided painfully bad fashion belongs to, lets find this man a shirt!" Christine looked a little lost but nodded in agreement. "Any last words Erik?"

"If the Fop can survive it, I can too!" He announced, his jaw set and his head held high.

"Okay, well I never thought I'd see the day when the Fop became your role model but now that Hell is officially frozen over lets get shopping!"

"This one!" Christine exclaimed after several more minutes of searching. "Its perfect!"

Erik's sigh of resignation was quite audible from several feet away.

"Now don't get too excited Erik. Remember your heart condition!" I teased as we made our way to where Christine was holding the garment destined for Erik. He snorted good-naturedly but the fear didn't leave his eyes as she handed it over to him.

The shirt destined for Erik turned out to be a silk poet-type shirt with billowing sleeves that clasped tightly to his wrists. It was a rich deep red, similar in color to his beloved roses with a delicate sheen to it as it rippled through his fingers. It was truly a beautiful shirt.

"Oh, I'm going to buy this one since it matches Erik's shirt so well!" she cried happily, holding up her first blouse. Erik unconsciously smiled at the thought of her coordinating clothing to match with his. "I'm going to try it on right now!"

While I'm not sure when blue suddenly became the perfect match for red, I guess it does work out better than the green one would have. Though they would look really cute together during the holidays…

"Okay Erik, what size pants do you wear?" I asked as Christine rushed into a changing room with her stash.

"Why?" he asked suspiciously.

"So I can mention that information when I auction them off on EBay," I managed to keep a straight face for two seconds before bursting out into laughter. "Sometimes you're such a dork! Its so that I can help you find a pair in your size."

"All of my clothing is custom tailored to fit," he sneered.

"You are sucha snob. Here," I told him as I walked down the aisle grabbing a pair in every size. "Try all these on till you find one that fits." Handing him the pile, I smirked as he angrily marched off to the men's changing rooms.

It wasn't too long before Christine came out dressed in her "modern" outfit, which she naturally looked fabulous in. While we were waiting for Erik to finish trying on his clothes I decided to see if a certain someone's story matched up with hers concerning the previous evening.

"So what was the deal between you and Erik last night?"

"The deal?"

"Why did he seem to frighten you? And why did Raoul have a revolver?"

"He did? I bet he took it from Nadir again! I'll have to remember to tell Philippe when we get back…" She looked thoughtful for a moment, no doubt adding the mental note to her short list of things to remember.

"Why would the fo.. the Viscomte take his gun?"

"He wants to be more like John Wayne." I did a double take then realized she was serious. Irrepressible giggles burst out of my mouth as I envisioned Raouly-boy in his pink shirt with matching cowboy boots and his voice a hokey drawl, marching down to Erik's lair. _Well all right there phantom, you just git on outta this opery haus before som'thin a'bad happens to ya. _

"John Wayne! Why on earth would he want to be like John Wayne?" I managed to choke out around my laughter.

"Because he always beats the bad guy and wins the girl in the end!"

"Hang on, who told you this?"

"Meg."

"And how does Meg know about John Wayne?"

"Well you remember that day you came back from school and there was pizza stuck to the ceiling…"

"Never mind," I quickly cut her off not wanting to hear another story of Meg's adventures. "Just tell me why you and Erik were acting so weird last night."

"Did you ask Erik about it?" she evaded the question and shuffled her feet.

"Yes," I may not have gotten an honest answer out of him but I did ask.

"Does Erik like John Wayne?"

"I have no idea but I do know that you aren't answering my question." She sighed once and then completely without warning burst into tears. "Are you okay?" I asked as she sobbed on and on. Holding her by her shoulders I tried to be comforting, but I had no idea why she randomly started bawling. Maybe having her spending this much time with Erik is a bad idea…

"I just don't know what to do! Raoul is so sweet and gentle, and he loves me very much in his own way… But Erik loves me too! He taught me to sing and he has always taken care of me and… and…" her tears pouring from her eyes, she was too chocked up to continue for a moment so I let her catch her breath. "And he killed Buquet! And he made the chandelier fall! And I'm afraid…"

"What are you afraid of Christine? You know he would never hurt you." I soothed, holding her close.

"But I'm engaged to Raoul! He would hurt Raoul!" she sobbed. "He hates Raoul!"

_How many times can you say that damn name in a single minute! _I thought as she continued to bawl her eyes out. "Don't worry, I'm sure everything will turn out alright in the end."

"Okay," she sniffed. I nearly laughed; her emotions were so easily manipulated.

"Besides, its not like Raoul can't defend himself, he is a grown man," Okay, so you know and I know that this is probably one of the biggest lies ever told but lets not burden the kid with the awful truth that, even with a stolen revolver, her fiancé couldn't protect himself from a chicken, much less a very angry phantom.

"You're right!" She perked up instantly, like a dried up plant that's given some water. "I must try and see the best in this situation. If you can be brave, then I can to!"

"That's the spirit! Besides what could happen if we keep them apart?" She nodded happily and we put this latest crisis behind us.

After sitting and chatting amicably with Christine for another half an hour I was ready to go in and drag the incredibly slow-to-get-dressed Erik out.

"Come on Erik! What is taking you so long in there?" I called standing at the entrance the men's changing room.

"It couldn't have anything to do with the fact that you gave me three dozen pairs of pants to try on!" he shouted from one of the stalls.

"Did not! Come on out here and lets see how you look!"

"Patience is a virtue."

"And Barney is a dinosaur." I replied in my best totally innocent singsong voice. "Do I need to continue?"

"I'll be out in a moment!" He snarled angrily. I grinned and looked over at Christine who was regarding me strangely.

"What?" I asked. She merely shrugged her shoulders gracefully.

"I just don't know how you do that."

"Do what?"

"You make him do all sorts of things he wouldn't do."

"Well he'd do the same stuff for you if you asked him. He really loves you, you know."

She didn't answer but instead her jaw dropped and her eyes shot open. Turning back to the hallway, I too registered astonishment at the sight of Erik. His new black jeans were far more form fitting that his old pants had been and when combined with his luscious new shirt he looked every inch the fairy tale prince come to sweep the beautiful princess off her feet. There was only one little problem…

"Button your blasted shirt!" I screeched at him as he stepped further into the hallway. "You are _not_ Fabio so do not dress like him!" Startled, Erik hastily began fumbling with the buttons on his shirt but unfortunately my ranting was heard by Kristi, who immediately rushed over.

"Is there _anything_ I can help you with?" she asked gazing up adoringly at Erik as he continued to struggle with his buttons.

Waving my hand in front of her face to get her attention, I answered for everyone. "Yeah, I think we're ready to check out now, will it be okay for them to wear their clothing out of the store?"

"Ummm…" From the looks of her mischievous smile clearly she would prefer Erik to wear as little as possible out of the store. "I suppose so."

"Good. We'll come back later to look for a coat for you guys, its nice enough out today you shouldn't need one and I've still got to run by the market." Hiking up to the registers we quickly paid for the outfits and left, continuing on our grand adventure.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

"Remind me again why we're here." Erik asked despondently.

"We are buying food so that we do not starve to death." I replied.

"And how soon would we die if we didn't buy this food?"

"What?"

"I mean if its going to be a while before we die, then we could just put this off for a bit longer and …"

"Look Erik, we have been sitting in the parking lot for fifteen minutes. I can't take it any more. Get your rear end out of my car and calmly walk towards the door." With an exasperated sigh I climbed out of the car, quickly followed by Christine and headed to the entrance, determined not to look back. The only thing Erik couldn't stand more than being in a strange place, such as a parking lot, was being left alone in said strange place. Sure enough as the sliding doors slid open I caught his reflection in the glass behind me. "Glad you decided to join us Erik."

"Don't push it Mandy." Grinning at his attempts to steer the wobbly cart I led the way through the supermarket.

While I had at first thought that Erik would be impressed by the modern marvels of food preserving technology I found his focus was on dealing with another issue. At this time of day the store was relatively empty and though most of the people there didn't seem to care about Erik's odd appearance, naturally there were some who did.

In particular was one small and annoying child of about three who was strapped into his mother's cart. The red-faced child only stopped screaming his piercing scream when he saw Erik and from then on anywhere we three went here came that woman while her rude child.

"That child is doing it again." Erik snarled in my ear as the boy made yet another face at him with his fingers up his nose and pulling up his eyelids. "Are you sure my mask is on right?"

"Yes Erik," I mumbled back trying to concentrate on picking the best melon. "Does this one look ripe to you?"

"Yes, its fine. I swear that little beast can see straight through my mask!" He growled as the child made yet another disgusting face.

"Oh no, look it's got a soft spot. I'll have to pick another one."

"Just hurry up would you?"

"You can't rush me, I've got to pick a good one."

"But _why_?" he whined.

"_Because_," I whined right back. Erik humphed and turned back to the problem child who was now making even grosser faces. The last straw was when the boy licked a coupon flier and stuck it on half of his face imitating Erik.

"Demented little…" hearing the change in his tone I looked up to find Erik poised to hurl a cantaloupe at the child, now wide-eyed in panic. Just as he swung his arm forward I grabbed the melon out of his hand. It was only slightly bigger than the child's head and I had a sudden mental image of the evil child in a cape zooming around in his shopping cart like the headless horseman, frightening shoppers in the darker aisles and randomly throwing cantaloupes at them.

"Oh Erik you found the perfect one! Thank you so much!" I happily exclaimed as I carefully set it in the cart. He looked furious at me as I foiled his plan but I only smiled innocently. Trust Erik to make a cantaloupe into a deadly weapon. Returning his glare to the child, he was hit in the face with the wadded up and chewed on flier, much to the child's delight.

"I have never wanted to kill anyone this badly!" he hissed as he angrily wiped the spit off his face.

"He's just doing it for attention. Either ignore him or respond in a way he won't like."

"How?"

"Like this," with that I turned and made my own ugly face back at the child who promptly scowled and proceeded to pout.

"Oh Mandy! What a horrid face!" Christine breathlessly whimpered as she returned from her quest for another bag of chips. Oh course Erik, whose nerves were shot pretty badly already, grabbed his face in both hands and with a groan of misery sank to his knees.

"Oh poor Erik!" she cried as she dropped down to the floor beside him. Several people gave them odd looks but continued with their shopping. "This must be so terrible for you!" Wrapping her willowy arms around his trembling frame, she gently cooed soothing words into his ear.

_**A/N:** Rats! No pink shirt for the _other_ man in black! Still, we did get some color on the poor, tortured genius and I'm sure you all enjoyed this fop free chapter! (I know he was mentioned, but he wasn't actually in it so that doesn't count!) _

_A special shout out goes to Kristi AKA LiTTleLoTTe1991 for trying her very best. Sorry, but Erik just doesn't deserve to be forced to wear something so horrible. Well, maybe he does but that means I've got to look at it too and I certainly haven't done anything to deserve that!_

_Please Review! If only because Erik would want you… to review! I totally meant to review!_


	8. The Adventure Continues

_**Author's Note**: I'm not dead! I'm not dead! I'm not dead!  
Ok everybody I am really, really sorry to have just abandoned you all for so long. Things have just been so crazy for me and then my muse went for a cruise and well, I lost the will to write. Its sad I know, but I am really going to work harder on that and I hope that you will forgive me. Anyway this is by no means the best chapter ever, kind of a get-back-into-the-groove chapter if anything. I have some ideas for future chapters but I have to get to them first. So after a very long wait I present the mediocre Next Chapter!_

_**Disclaimer:** I own Mandy, and Marcel for now, but he is going to live with a reviewer as soon as I am done with him. Everybody else is a different story, sadly._

"Unhand her this instant, you monster!" An angry voice announced just behind me. Turning to look around, I was surprisingly unsurprised to find none other than Roaul with a pistol in his hand aimed straight at Erik. Behind him stood Philippe and Marcel, both looking quite stunned. Everyone froze.

What can I say, it was like watching a bad foreign film, as though any second ninja warriors were going to launch over the deli counter and drop down from their lofty perches atop the isles and attack. Instead, reality kicked back in, sort of.

"Raoul!" Christine cried out in alarm, though she didn't let go of Erik, who seemed quite obliviously content where he was. "What are you doing?"

"Where did you get that!" Philippe shouted at his brother as the shock wore off. "You give that to me this instant young man! You could hurt somebody with that!" He made a swift grab for the weapon but Raoul dogged around him, using the little French blaher as a human shield.

"No, don't worry it isn't loaded, I couldn't find any bullets." Marcel nodded vigorously, and blah blahed more totally incomprehensible stuff to which Roaul responded. "Yes but the monster doesn't know that!"

"He does now," I smirked as I smacked the gun out of Raoul's hands. He pouted as the gun clattered to the floor, making a horrendous racket on the slick tiles. Looking around at the faces of stunned shoppers who were avidly watching the little drama before them I decided leaving soon would be a very good option. "Alright folks, nothing to see here."

"He's got a gun!" came the delayed reaction of one woman who ran off shrieking. Thankfully the other shoppers opted not to join in her hysteria, seeing as how the situation was already under control, and instead watched in eerie silence as she disappeared down one of the isles.

"Look, we are leaving _now_ and we will discuss this back at the apartment." I growled under my breath to three intruders. "Let's just get out of here before the cops show up."

"Never!" The viscount cried, "I will see that foul creature dead before I surrender!"   
Everyone present, random shoppers included, looked at the fop as though he were the biggest moron on the face of the earth. Which he may well have been.

"Fine, don't surrender, withdraw and attempt to figure out a change of battle tactics, or confiscate a white horse, or rally the troop or whatever the heck you want but we _are_ leaving now." I hissed. Out of the corner of my eye I noticed a shadow moving and I turned to find Erik picking up the discarded gun. "Don't even think about it! Give it to me right now or so help me…"

"It isn't even loaded," Erik pouted, slightly put out as he reluctantly handed the gun over.

"Yeah but if anybody anywhere was ever likely to have bullets for that gun conveniently hidden in a cloak pocket it would totally be you." I replied keeping a wary eye on the watching crowd as I stashed the gun in my own coat pocket. "You guys go wait in the car while I get checked out and if _anybody_ attempts to do _anything_," death glare at Raoul, "that I would _not_ approve of," death glare at Erik, "I will do something so terrible the mere mention of it would drive you mad."

The little assembly looked suitably terrified, well except for Erik who was looking wistfully at Christine again, even though she was ignoring him again. He never takes my threats seriously.

"Security to isle seven, security to isle seven," droned a bored voice from the store's intercom. Looking up in sudden panic, everyone was slightly confused to note we were in isle twenty-four. What could possibly be over there that could be worse than this? Instead of finding out I began herding the crew towards the front.

"Come on, before they get it right! Just go sit in the car." Digging in my pocket I managed to find my keys and handed them to Erik. "Start it and you are dead. Scratch it and you are dead. Hurt its feelings and …"

"Mandy may I remind you that it was you who said we don't have much time." Erik muttered in irritation. "Besides its going to take enough time getting everyone inside, you're car isn't exactly the roomiest mode of transportation."

"You be nice to my baby!" Erik sighed and rolled his eyes but thankfully followed as everyone filed out the doors without comment.

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"I'm squashed," a voice whined from the back seat. "Its too hot in here."

In reality the fop probably was squashed, not that I cared, sitting between his brother and his new buddy in the back seat. I was rather squashed myself but since it was Erik who was squashing me I wasn't about to complain. Neither was he from the look on his face. I doubt he'd ever been squashed between two females before. Sadly Christine didn't seem to notice as she gazed out the window like a puppy.

"I don't want to sit back here, why can't I sit in the front?" he continued to whine despite the lack of a reaction from his last complaint. I reached forward and turned on the radio and with a pointed look at Erik, turned the dial to the local classical station, which was _not_ playing opera. A loud huff was heard from the back and was also ignored. "Its not fair."

"Hey, it's my car and my rules so be quite." I warned over the soft music.

"But I don't want to sit here. Why can't I sit by the window? Or by Christine? Why does _he_ get to sit by Christine?" The fop whined without pausing for a breath. "I can't see anything. Marcel is touching me. Philippe is too. Make them stop it. Are we there yet?"

"SHUT UP!" I screamed coming to a conveniently placed stop sign with a screech of tires. "Christine, change places with Philippe this second before I lose it!

"But I want to sit by the _window_." Complained Raoul once again.

I lost it.

Ten minutes of insane ranting, screaming intensively detailed death threats and horrors hereto unheard of in civilized countries later, my little carload sat in wide-eyed silence, eons beyond stunned or shocked, except for Erik, who was rather irritated that he was out of scratch paper on which to jot down ideas. No one moved, no one dared.

"Christine darling, would you mind sitting between Marcel and the Viscount for the rest of the trip?" Erik asked softly, so as not to destroy the tense atmosphere I had created.

"Umm okay," she replied cautiously as she got out of the car. Philippe and Raoul climbed out to allow her to slide in and Philippe took her place in the front next to Erik while Raoul claimed his window seat. An awkward silence filled the car.

"Now then Mandy, whenever you feel like it, you may continue." Erik announced comfortingly.

"Okay," I mumbled back as the car crept forward. And then in a whisper I asked, "Did it work?"

"I can only hope so." Erik replied just barely audible. "If not, I doubt anything would keep him quiet."

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_**A/N**: (Sigh) Well there it is, not quite up to my usual standard but… (shrugs) Oh well thank you for reading it anyway and review if you want._

_P.S – I think a reviewer owes me some cookies : )  
_


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